Now that's a news title

Deadman

Only in the North East.....

https://www.gazettelive.co.uk/news/teesside-news/drunk-whacked-penis-womens-car-14982844

Just in case they change the title (and I can say "I was there")

Drunk whacked penis on women's car then did poo in street - as they sat and ate chips

57Deluxe

was a scene or two just like this in current series of Picnic at Hanging Rock...

munckee

No its a southern thing too, a friend of mine (it really was a friend) who is now a senior whitehall civil servant was caught by mr plod while defecating on a drain cover when extremely drunk.  Mr plod (quite rightly) made him kneel on the road and pick it up with leaves and put it in a dog poo bin, they were generous enough to allow my friend to remove his jeans and boxers and use his boxers as toilet roll and place in the bin too.

spark240

Fur Fox Sake !

Bellycaster

He probably thought they wanted a bit of Kofte with their Chips.

  

jdgm

I always liked -

"Man Dies In Pie-Eating Contest"

- BBC news site about a decade ago, happened in Wales.

axisus

To be fair, the North East mating ritual has never gone down well in other parts of the country.