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Office jargon

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  • MistergMisterg Frets: 293
    Heard a corker on the wireless just now. Some woman was speaking about a no email day, and begins her spiel:

    "In a global world...." Eddie Mayer (?) interrupted her and said "Well you can't argue with that!"
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  • IanSavage said:

    Teaching is lousy with acronyms - once you've worked out which kids in a group are G&T, EAL, SEN (for which they can be SA or SAP)or BESD (as notified by the LEA or SENCO) you need to check their IAP in order to assign their ELP, which you then communicate to your assigned LSA or LST to try to avoid those with a PSP being removed to the LSU.

     

    I'd love it if I was joking, or even exaggerating. I'm not.

    Edu-speak is worse than computing for taking words and using them to mean something else. When I were a lad, differentiation was something you did to an equation to get its gradient. I've also heard the term used to describe what happens to body cells so that they know whether to become skin cells, bone cells, bits of your internal organs etc, but now it's apparently a term used to describe how you give out tasks that separate out the more advanced students ... or that will keep the more advance students occupied while the duffers catch up. I suspect duffers is not correct edu-speak.
    "Working" software has only unobserved bugs. (Parroty Error: Pieces of Nine! Pieces of Nine!)
    Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
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  • Emp_FabEmp_Fab Frets: 24210
    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.
    Also chips are "Plant-based" no matter how you cook them.
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  • Social housing development I have spent today going through audit files for.. The HCA GFP covering AR SC and NBHB. All homes have to be CFSH Level 3 and HQI & DQS compliant. Land from GNHP and DHP has LA Grant and RCGF implications Don't ask
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  • SporkySporky Frets: 27586
    I worked on a couple of airport projects a few years back - in my limited experience they're even worse than IT or the military for acronyms. Entire conversations went by with me interrupting almost everything to ask what each thing was.

    At my current work the one that irks me most me is "JFDI" - "just fucking do it" - because it's always said by someone with no idea what "it" in this context is, let alone how to "do it". Usually I'll have brought up a complex technical issue for which there is no simple solution, and presented a few options for how we might overcome it, and "JFDI" doesn't really answer how you're going to deal with the problem. It's not a useful alternative. It's not an authorisation to go for one of the solutions. I've been thinking of responding with "YDUTIT?"
    "[Sporky] brings a certain vibe and dignity to the forum."
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  • ESBlondeESBlonde Frets: 3576
    Social housing development I have spent today going through audit files for.. The HCA GFP covering AR SC and NBHB. All homes have to be CFSH Level 3 and HQI & DQS compliant. Land from GNHP and DHP has LA Grant and RCGF implications Don't ask
    Pfft,

    I worked in a LA accounts dept for 6 months a few years back as maternity cover. Each department in the council has it's own set of abbreviations/acronyms to add to the office jargon and PC attitude. It was hard work staying on message or even trying to decipher it! Just as you thought you understood one dept. You moved onto another and started all over again. The numbers were the easy bit. Then I got given a development project which required consultation with other LA's, these guys were making up new acronyms and abbreviations on the hoof they were so full of it.
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  • siremoonsiremoon Frets: 1524
    edited October 2013
    I work for an American company so corporate emails full of meaningless b/s phrases are plentiful.

    My own "favourite" was one about a new screensaver, where the corporate droid who sent it claimed to be "totally excited by the prospect of leveraging platform idle time to portray a positive image of the enterprise vision".

    Since then I have added an inbox rule that deletes anything with "leverage" or variations thereof in it.
    “He is like a man with a fork in a world of soup.” - Noel Gallagher
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  • @Sporky I'm sleepy this morning and haven't sussed YDUTIT but if you explain it would I kick myself for not getting it?
    "Working" software has only unobserved bugs. (Parroty Error: Pieces of Nine! Pieces of Nine!)
    Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
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  • EricTheWearyEricTheWeary Frets: 16253
    I have a tendency to talk about hats, although as this has been pointed out to me so many times I am keeping it more under control now.
    'With my performance hat on this is a good idea but with my quality control hat on there are concerns and with my HR hat on it would also leave us vulnerable. But with my risk hat on I can see this is problematic so I need to put my management hat on and say no.'
    Tipton is a small fishing village in the borough of Sandwell. 
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  • siremoonsiremoon Frets: 1524
    edited October 2013
    "I see, and which hat are you talking through at the moment?" 

    Sir Humphrey Appleby in the Yes Minister episode "The Devil You Know"

    :)
    “He is like a man with a fork in a world of soup.” - Noel Gallagher
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  • @Sporky I'm sleepy this morning and haven't sussed YDUTIT but if you explain it would I kick myself for not getting it?

    You Do-it U TIT (maybe lol)
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  • EricTheWearyEricTheWeary Frets: 16253
    siremoon said:
    "I see, and which hat are you talking through at the moment?" 

    Sir Humphrey Appleby in the Yes Minister episode "The Devil You Know"

    :)
    My arse hat most of the time.
    Tipton is a small fishing village in the borough of Sandwell. 
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  • SporkySporky Frets: 27586
    edited October 2013
    @Sporky I'm sleepy this morning and haven't sussed YDUTIT but if you explain it would I kick myself for not getting it?
    I can't remember what it was. :D

    I tend to make that sort of thing up on the spot and assume no-one will call my bluff. I'm sure I worked it out at the time. Hmm.

    "You Don't Understand The Issue, Then?" That seems plausible. Not sure it's what I meant at the time though.

    I'm going to plead the sleepy thing too then.
    "[Sporky] brings a certain vibe and dignity to the forum."
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  • Try working for a military aviation engineering company. Every other word is an acronym, the meaning of which seems to have been lost decades ago.

    Although people generally know what the acronym refers to, most/all the people don't actually know what the letters stand for any more and get irritated when you actually dare to ask what it actually means.
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  • SporkySporky Frets: 27586
    I got completely flummoxed by "FCU" the other day.

    Fan Coil Unit. I even know what one is, what it does and why it needs to be where they'd drawn it, and still I didn't twig. I'd never heard it abbreviated before.
    "[Sporky] brings a certain vibe and dignity to the forum."
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  • Thing is I can get acronyms when they are within the company, if you are part of the corporation then however much of an individual you are, you still have to conform to appease THUTY (those higher up than you!)

    What gets me are the endless emails and phone calls I get from these corporations trying to sell me their services and don't speak in words I understand "DMS" "EMM" etc been out of it for too long.

    Had a bloke ring me up to talk to the IT department when I asked him what he meant He just kept saying "the IT department" when I asked him what IT stood for he hung up!  
    www.maltingsaudio.co.uk
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  • EricTheWearyEricTheWeary Frets: 16253
    We had the chap in the other day to do the PAT testing. So we are told (verbally) by the admin manager this is going to happen. Clearly people just accept this at face value with only a rough idea of what it means, but no big issue.

    Anyhoo the guy comes and goes and afterwards we discover he tested stuff he shouldn't have, unplugging the CCTV system and losing our security records for 24 hours. Some angry emails flying about this now with variations on PAT, Pat, Pac, Park, Past and Pat's testing. Now, PAT testing is not part of our jargon at all but we seem to be so used to the idea that jargon is acceptable no one seems to have the foggiest what it actually does mean and are still batting it about.
    Tipton is a small fishing village in the borough of Sandwell. 
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  • Phil_aka_PipPhil_aka_Pip Frets: 9794
    edited October 2013
    It irks me that you have to have PAT Test ie a Portable Appliance test Test. It also irks me that I need a PIN Number, ie a Personal Identification Number Number. Whereas my van only has a VIN ie a Vehicle Identification Number. I think it is missing out on a Number somewhere. That's discrimination!
    "Working" software has only unobserved bugs. (Parroty Error: Pieces of Nine! Pieces of Nine!)
    Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
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  • mike_lmike_l Frets: 5700

    Best ever acronym is

    DILLIGAF

     

     

    Ringleader of the Cambridge cartel, pedal champ and king of the dirt boxes (down to 21) 

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  • In Project Management, I do not like Resource Smoothing. I believes that it could result in the client's journey to project realisation being increased, which may have a negative impact on the stakeholder's project experience. 
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