Bass player infractions

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DLMDLM Frets: 2513
edited December 2017 in Bass

This list has been around for ages, but I'd never seen it on here or on MR. It caused a good deal of mirth when our drummer hung it up on the rehearsal room door before practise last week...

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BIoihCCCcAAEkEV.jpg

[Edit: replaced Photobucket link for longevity].

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Comments

  • ICBMICBM Frets: 71950
    edited April 2014
    lol

    and more lol

    and then trying not to lol because I do many of those things

    "Take these three items, some WD-40, a vise grip, and a roll of duct tape. Any man worth his salt can fix almost any problem with this stuff alone." - Walt Kowalski

    "Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand." - Homer Simpson

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  • Dave_McDave_Mc Frets: 2324
    :))

    Especially LOL at the mutually exclusive ones

    "forgetting to turn amp on" should maybe have been a negative fine (i.e. a bonus) considering the tone of the rest of the sheet
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  • TheOtherDennisTheOtherDennis Frets: 2010
    edited April 2014

    :))

    I particularly liked "Beginning sentences with 'When I was a guitar player...' "
    If you must have sex with a frog, wear a condom. If you want the frog to have fun, rib it.
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  • fretmeisterfretmeister Frets: 23906
    I'm guilty of at least all of them
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  • DeeTeeDeeTee Frets: 764
    Was this stolen from James Brown?
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  • DLMDLM Frets: 2513
    Nah, this is for a larf. James Brown actually fined his musicians.
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  • DLMDLM Frets: 2513
    Time for a bump! :) Taking the fretless 5 I've got on approval to the room, where this still hangs, I was amused to discover that it affords me the second-highest fine! :lol:
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  • I liked "continually shouting yeah!". Is there a guitar version? 
    "A city star won’t shine too far"


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  • DLMDLM Frets: 2513
    @mudslide73 I've not seen one yet, but I just turned up (and posted) one for drummers!
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  • FunkfingersFunkfingers Frets: 14320
    It would be worth watching This Is Spïnal Tap again to see how many infractions Derek Smalls incurs.

    Where are:
    1) thudding away on one string with your picking hand whilst raising the other arm up in a clenched fist gesture?
    2) telling people that the only bass you need is a _________________________ (fill in the blank). 

    Be seeing you.
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  • Excellent, I particularly liked the Criminal Bad taste section, for some reason mention of the bone player reminded me of that Bone Flute player in Brian Pern : >
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  • BridgehouseBridgehouse Frets: 24578

    2) telling people that the only bass you need is a _________________________ (fill in the blank). 

    Precision

    Oh hang on.. this is a joke, isn't it?
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  • DLMDLM Frets: 2513
    Excellent, I particularly liked the Criminal Bad taste section, for some reason mention of the bone player reminded me of that Bone Flute player in Brian Pern : >

    Ha! It's really " 'bone ". Most people I mix with musically have not had enough exposure to jazz to get every reference. :)
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  • @DLM - reading the list and PMSL at the ones which I've seen happen, mostly from a bloke we had in a covers band. He'd play the intro to Livin On A Prayer at full volume while people were trying to talk, even though we didn't do the song. It was like Tourettes or something, The rest of the band learned the song and when we went to do it at rehearsal, the bass player kept fucking up the intro! :)
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  • DLMDLM Frets: 2513

    @Guitar_Slinger Yeah, this is so funny because it's so accurate! Even if musical fashions have changed a little, it still rings true. :)

    The bassist in my band Cyrence uses a limited edition MM, the 3-band EQ version with ebony board, matching headstock and special graphics worth a $150 fine according to the table: :skull: :lol:

    https://www.promusictools.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/3200x2133.3333333333/bd5be3e4bffe87df985139cc5e5c836c/m/u/music-man-usa-stingray-4-splatter-limited-edition-10-black_1.jpg

    \m/

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