Worst Job(s)

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  • kaypeejaykaypeejay Frets: 775
    Foster said:
    Octafish said:
    The worst job I ever had was pulling lobsters out of Jayne Mansfield's arsehole....
    My worst job was dressing up as a lobster for Jayne Mansfield. I refuse to talk about it.
    Used to work at a dry cleaners. You should have seen the state of some of the lobster costumes people used to bring in!
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  • where's Connor? I bet he'd have a contribution?
    "Working" software has only unobserved bugs. (Parroty Error: Pieces of Nine! Pieces of Nine!)
    Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
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  • Winny_PoohWinny_Pooh Frets: 7731
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  • EvilmagsEvilmags Frets: 5158
    Tattie picking in Scotish farms in the 80s, at 13 or 14 years old, for a tenner a day. 
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  • axisusaxisus Frets: 28280
    Worked in a print shop with 5 guys, four of them were called Chris. I was 17 and I had to laminate 1000s of things, cut out 1000s of tickets, staple 10o0s of sheets. Utterly dull and boring, I kept almost nodding off. Fortunately it was just a summer job.
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  • axisusaxisus Frets: 28280
    My first proper job was in a drawing office. They employed this one guy and after the first day he said "I hate this, I quit". He'd only accepted the job because his wife made him. Bet she was pleased.
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  • 57Deluxe57Deluxe Frets: 7329
    "...I ever had, was retrieving lobsters out of Jane Masfield's arsehole..."



    <Vintage BOSS Upgrades>
    __________________________________
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  • barry2tonebarry2tone Frets: 212
    edited January 2019
    I suppose that, objectively, the worst job I had was in the processing warehouse of a wool factory - when the shit-covered wool would have to be taken off the trucks, sorted by hand, then processed etc. Not only was it a crappy (heh) job, but it was also during the summer when the warehouse would pretty much get to 43 degrees C as soon as the sun came up and stay there until it was time to go home.



    I'd managed to bury my memory of doing the same as a summer vac. job.  Thanks for reminding me, it's up there with the worst.   

    Curiously, a couple of of the most difficult times I've had have been bumping into employment with no work to be done, but  visible presence required.

    The last was a reasonably paid research job.
    But with no desk, let alone office, computer  or secretarial support (NHS), I could generate about one contact a day, which took up an hour.  The rest was compulsory presenteeism with nowhere to hide. 
    I couldn't take the stress, and had to quit for sanity's sake.
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  • thumpingrugthumpingrug Frets: 2890
    edited January 2019
    Evilmags said:
    Tattie picking in Scotish farms in the 80s, at 13 or 14 years old, for a tenner a day. 
    I did a couple of weeks of spud picking in Yorkshire in 1980 when I was 14, also for a tenner a day.  Must have been standard rate.  Job involved standing on the picking machine while it was being pulled around the fields trying to spot bad spuds and lobbing them overboard.  I earned £100 over two weeks which seemed a fortune at 14, but at 10 hour days it was slave labour wages.

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  • boogiemanboogieman Frets: 12314
    Seeing all the food factory jobs reminds me about an old girlfriend who had a summer job in a liquorice factory. She was put on the Pontefract Cake line and told she could eat as many as she wanted. She scoffed down loads on her first day and got the raging shits. She only lasted a day there and it put her off the stuff for life. She lived near the factory too and said that whenever the smell of liquorice wafted over she’d feel queasy. 
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  • EvilmagsEvilmags Frets: 5158
    Evilmags said:
    Tattie picking in Scotish farms in the 80s, at 13 or 14 years old, for a tenner a day. 
    I did a couple of weeks of spud picking in Yorkshire in 1980 when I was 14, also for a tenner a day.  Must have been standard rate.  Job involved standing on the picking machine while it was being pulled around the fields trying to spot bad spuds and lobbing them overboard.  I earned £100 over two weeks which season a fortune at 14, but at 10 hour days its was slave labour wages.
    We had to pick the bloody things. Bent over and I to plastic baskets. With some big Teuchter running around screaming "puck yer tatties clean, or ye sonny get paid ohn I'll kick yer arse oot the park". 
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  • DopesickDopesick Frets: 1507
    +1 for Parcelforce nightshift. Fucking torture. Only lasted one shift.
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  • boogieman said:
    Seeing all the food factory jobs reminds me about an old girlfriend who had a summer job in a liquorice factory. She was put on the Pontefract Cake line and told she could eat as many as she wanted. She scoffed down loads on her first day and got the raging shits. She only lasted a day there and it put her off the stuff for life. She lived near the factory too and said that whenever the smell of liquorice wafted over she’d feel queasy. 
    I've been told that in biccy factories they also tell you that you can eat as many as you like. Usually a new employee will pig them for 2 days then settle down to just having 1 with the tea break. It saves the management from having to police "quotas".
    "Working" software has only unobserved bugs. (Parroty Error: Pieces of Nine! Pieces of Nine!)
    Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
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  • PerdixPerdix Frets: 136
    As a plumber I get called to deal with blocked toilets about once a month. As you can imagine this is not a pleasant job, used sanitary towels wrapped around the blades of a macerator was a recent find. That pales into insignificance  compared to the gut wrenching stench that is released from blocked urinals. It's disgusting. Its like it gets absorbed into your skin and hair, even after a vigorous shower the odour remains. As for the van it takes a good 2-3 days to clear.
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  • RobDaviesRobDavies Frets: 3062
    edited January 2019
    First job was with Studiospares which on reflection, was a pretty good gig but the travelling to and from Uxbridge to Camden everyday was eventually to become my downfall, and I was 'asked to leave'. 
    Which led me on to a temping job at Dixon's Financial Services in Harrow.... a data input role ("you like playing with computers, don't you Rob?") which involved punching postcodes into a PC for eight hours a day - for about four quid an hour. 
    I think I lasted about five weeks...and that was only because there was a Burger King nearby, so I could have a decent lunch every day.  But the job was mind numbing, the people were absolute crunts... oh, and I was accused of racism for listening to NWA. 

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  • bobblehatbobblehat Frets: 531
    First job was making Pastry in a Pie Factory. It was back breaking work and relentless as you had to keep the production line fed. Was constantly getting bollocked for not keeping up and having to shut the lines.Stuck at it for 5 weeks as I needed the money.
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  • SeshSesh Frets: 1839
    Folding and putting leaflets in the lids of aerosol cans was the most tedious.

    Once I spent two weeks as part of a group of temps reworking 10000 Samsung monitors that had been sent to the UK with American plugs. They needed some resoldering too. The two Koreans overseeing the work spoke no english. Samsung drafted in someone from their Dutch office as translator, as he was part Korean. Turns out he spoke very little Korean, and less English. He insisted his name was Prince. If they had their way they would have worked us all day without breaks. That didn't happen. One of the temps was 6ft+ rugbytype and towered over them. Break negotiations went well for us. I was one of only two who did the full two weeks. As a "prize" we were rewarded with a "noodle bowl" each, which was basically a Korean pot noodle. It gave me the shits. £2.50 /hr.
    Can't sing, can't dance, can handle a guitar a little.
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  • MyrandaMyranda Frets: 2940
    Hmm... I temp'ed for two days picking litter - at a landfill. Even my father who was very much of the opinion "you work and pay rent, or else!" told me to not go back to it. Most of the first day was the safety videos, which only hit home when after being told that run-off water was toxic seeing a deep puddle with a series of dead birds around it, and a dead fox - MID DRINK POSE... how lethal was that stuff?

    Did two weeks during a summer heatwave 3 storeys up inside a warehouse scraping soot off the inside of a warehouse after a fire... sweat rolling off every inch wearing all over plasticy coveralls and leaning over the abyss on a platform that would sway as you scrub... several years on I still probably find soot from that job... such filth, many wow.

    Warehouse job so tedious that I went a bit loopy, and almost swung a punch at a co-worker before deciding it was time to leave ...

    When I was a young'un I worked evenings in the cinema and felt it was pretty soul destroying to see your friends out for a good time while you worked. Though the reality was I had a load of fun at work most of the time thanks to the people I was working with, so it was only some low moments really.

    Ooh, a data entry temp job where you were literally not permitted to chat at all, even if you were working at a decent pace. There was no music, and you weren't allowed to wear headphones. just silently tapping away. I didn't go back after a few days
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