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I wish someone would invent...

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Emp_FabEmp_Fab Frets: 24211
This is a thread for you to say what gadget it is that you wish someone would invent.  Try to resist the temptation to put "hilarious" adolescent answers like "A robotic supermodel that can suck the chrome off a bumper" etc, or extreme answers like "Clean nuclear power" - just objects, tools, day-to-day items that would make your life easier.

Mine:  I wish someone would invent a device that could synchronise MIDI devices to a live drummer.  Something that can recognise the position in the song and exactly follow the tempo the drummer is producing.

   
Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.
Also chips are "Plant-based" no matter how you cook them.
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Comments

  • LodiousLodious Frets: 1942
    A device that makes cables stay when you pass them up behind a desk for just long enough to get from under the desk and grab them. 
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  • BRISTOL86BRISTOL86 Frets: 1920
    A machine to get me out of bed and ready for work in the morning like the Jetsons had!
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  • beed84beed84 Frets: 2403
    A cold pillow during the summer.
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  • mgawmgaw Frets: 5239
    edited January 2019
    something that stops @Emp_Fab creating click bait nonsense threads ALL the time...I know how about a job:)
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  • gringopiggringopig Frets: 2648
    edited July 2020
    .
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  • ICBMICBM Frets: 71963
    Emp_Fab said:

    Mine:  I wish someone would invent a device that could synchronise MIDI devices to a live drummer.  Something that can recognise the position in the song and exactly follow the tempo the drummer is producing.
    This exists - or at least something close to it - it's called a Kahler Human Clock. Made in the 1980s by the same company that did the locking vibrato units, surprisingly!

    It now appears to be very rare, and the concept apparently never caught on - so either it didn't work properly, or it was superceded by some other hardware or software solution...


    Mine would be a hardware multi-FX unit which doesn't come with any actual effects, but instead allows you to buy them online and download into the unit via wi-fi or Bluetooth, like a universal version of TC Toneprint crossed with the App Store, accessed from a phone or tablet. Each module should have a number of physical knobs to control the main parameters in use, and further tweakability from the remote device. Independent developers would have access to the store to sell their own creations.

    I may be overlooking something like this that already exists, but if it does I haven't come across it.

    "Take these three items, some WD-40, a vise grip, and a roll of duct tape. Any man worth his salt can fix almost any problem with this stuff alone." - Walt Kowalski

    "Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand." - Homer Simpson

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  • Emp_FabEmp_Fab Frets: 24211
    Wis for that.  Flappy duvet face is most irritating !
    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.
    Also chips are "Plant-based" no matter how you cook them.
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  • ICBM said:
    Emp_Fab said:

    Mine:  I wish someone would invent a device that could synchronise MIDI devices to a live drummer.  Something that can recognise the position in the song and exactly follow the tempo the drummer is producing.
    This exists - or at least something close to it - it's called a Kahler Human Clock. Made in the 1980s by the same company that did the locking vibrato units, surprisingly!

    It now appears to be very rare, and the concept apparently never caught on - so either it didn't work properly, or it was superceded by some other hardware or software solution...
    https://www.ableton.com/en/packs/beatseeker/

    Bye!

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  • ICBMICBM Frets: 71963
    ICBM said:
    Emp_Fab said:

    Mine:  I wish someone would invent a device that could synchronise MIDI devices to a live drummer.  Something that can recognise the position in the song and exactly follow the tempo the drummer is producing.
    This exists - or at least something close to it - it's called a Kahler Human Clock. Made in the 1980s by the same company that did the locking vibrato units, surprisingly!

    It now appears to be very rare, and the concept apparently never caught on - so either it didn't work properly, or it was superceded by some other hardware or software solution...
    https://www.ableton.com/en/packs/beatseeker/

    Thanks!

    Actually, you might be the very man to answer the other bit too. Do you know of anything like that, and if there isn't, do you know anyone who knows enough about all that sort of tech to put the concept together? I assume it would need the backing of a fairly big company because there's a lot to get off the ground all at one go, but I really have no idea...

    "Take these three items, some WD-40, a vise grip, and a roll of duct tape. Any man worth his salt can fix almost any problem with this stuff alone." - Walt Kowalski

    "Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand." - Homer Simpson

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  • vizviz Frets: 10647
    Like a microwave that can chill instead of heat up. So many times as young parents we over-warmed a bottle and needed to cool it quickly. 
    Roland said: Scales are primarily a tool for categorising knowledge, not a rule for what can or cannot be played.
    Supportact said: [my style is] probably more an accumulation of limitations and bad habits than a 'style'.
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  • WazmeisterWazmeister Frets: 9450
    edited January 2019
    A 747 that anyone could fly... :)
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  • ICBM said:
    ICBM said:
    Emp_Fab said:

    Mine:  I wish someone would invent a device that could synchronise MIDI devices to a live drummer.  Something that can recognise the position in the song and exactly follow the tempo the drummer is producing.
    This exists - or at least something close to it - it's called a Kahler Human Clock. Made in the 1980s by the same company that did the locking vibrato units, surprisingly!

    It now appears to be very rare, and the concept apparently never caught on - so either it didn't work properly, or it was superceded by some other hardware or software solution...
    https://www.ableton.com/en/packs/beatseeker/

    Thanks!

    Actually, you might be the very man to answer the other bit too. Do you know of anything like that, and if there isn't, do you know anyone who knows enough about all that sort of tech to put the concept together? I assume it would need the backing of a fairly big company because there's a lot to get off the ground all at one go, but I really have no idea...
    I'm afraid I don't. Many people have tried something along those lines, the Muse Receptor being the most successful I'd say.

    It's actually a huge technical challenge, and I don't think it's possible personally. Too many different specifications to bring together.

    Bye!

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  • gringopig said:
    A machine which would change the duvet sheet and get all the corners snug and filled so you don't pull up a flappy bit of duvet cover to your face when getting comfy.
    You don't need one, just do this @gringopig ;

    Watch from 1:12



    I bet you watch it more than once as well ;)
    Only a Fool Would Say That.
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  • mgawmgaw Frets: 5239
    /\ that is the single most useful bit of advice I have got from the Fretboard :)
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  • I wish someone would invent a buyer for my Classifieds Stuff  B)
    Only a Fool Would Say That.
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  • gringopig said:
    A machine which would change the duvet sheet and get all the corners snug and filled so you don't pull up a flappy bit of duvet cover to your face when getting comfy.
    You don't need one, just do this @gringopig ;

    Watch from 1:12



    I bet you watch it more than once as well ;)
    Isn't that what everyone does?

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  • How about a self tuning guitar? You tell it what tuning you want, it whirrs and clicks and a second or two later, there it is, perfectly in tune. 

    A bit like the one Gibson / Tronical do, only working and reliable. ;) 

    My Trading Feedback    |    You Bring The Band

    Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you
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  • Winny_PoohWinny_Pooh Frets: 7735
    Anti-salt, like when you fuckup and over salt during cooking and want to save the meal.


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  • Emp_FabEmp_Fab Frets: 24211
    Now THAT is a good idea !
    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.
    Also chips are "Plant-based" no matter how you cook them.
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  • fandangofandango Frets: 2204
    gringopig said:
    A machine which would change the duvet sheet and get all the corners snug and filled so you don't pull up a flappy bit of duvet cover to your face when getting comfy.
    You don't need one, just do this @gringopig ;

    Watch from 1:12



    I bet you watch it more than once as well ;)
    Well, pickle my feathers, that’s going to be some timesaver!

    Didn't need to watch it again, she’s coming round soon.  ;)
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