Music - What grinds your gears?

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HAL9000HAL9000 Frets: 6155
Following on from the What Grinds Your Gears thread in the guitar section, I wondering what grinds your gears in music.

For me it's got to be the ubiquitous full-tone lift (usually plus strings/choir) on the last verse of just about anything on X Factor type programs.

A distant second is songs that fade out at the end. Come on - if you can come up with an interesting or imaginative beginning, you should be able to come up with an imaginative or interesting ending.
In my hand I hold a piece of perforated paper
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  • shaunmshaunm Frets: 1243
    Slowing a song down and then claiming its now totally different. Also see Xfactor. But also see Kings of Leon version of Dancing on my own. 


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  • JerkMoansJerkMoans Frets: 4802
    Dubstep :angry: 
    Self-confessed Blues Lawyer
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  • JonathangusJonathangus Frets: 650
    Singers who demonstrate their incredible vocal control by embellishing every single note instead of singing me a goddamn tune.
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  • Philly_QPhilly_Q Frets: 8321
    shaunm said:
    Slowing a song down and then claiming its now totally different.

    It also has to be performed in a fragile, whispery, whiney, singer-songwritery way, with minimalist accompaniment.

    Instant John Lewis Christmas advert.

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  • JerkMoansJerkMoans Frets: 4802
    edited July 30
    Philly_Q said:
    shaunm said:
    Slowing a song down and then claiming its now totally different.

    It also has to be performed in a fragile, whispery, whiney, singer-songwritery way, with minimalist accompaniment.

    Instant John Lewis Christmas advert.

    Oh God.  Breathy acoustic cover versions of 80's hits, chock full of faux-emotion.

    A weak folky cover version of “Blue Monday” in the coffee bar? NOOOoo! Make it stop!!!!
    Self-confessed Blues Lawyer
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  • ICBMICBM Frets: 48641
    Every one of the indistinguishable identikit Autotuned male 'urban' (this may not be the right genre name, but I'm over 50 so I can't be expected to keep up ;) ) 'singers' (most of them probably can't, without Autotune) who seem to think they're God's gift to women.

    "Take these three items, some WD-40, a vise grip, and a roll of duct tape. Any man worth his salt can fix almost any problem with this stuff alone." - Walt Kowalski

    "Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand." - Homer Simpson

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  • scrumhalfscrumhalf Frets: 6844
    Lyrics. 99.99% of them are utter crap.

    I don't care about your feelings. I care as much about your thoughts on love as I do about your thoughts on non-ferrous welding. And I have no desire to dance, no matter how much you may implore me with your sub-juvenile rhyming and over-emoting.

    Either read a bit to inspire you, grab an instrument or shut up. 
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  • lasermonkeylasermonkey Frets: 1888
    Another submission for those winsome, acoustic covers of dance, indie and classic rock songs that advertisers have been foisting on us for the last fifteen years. Ad makers! Can you come up with another idea, please? It's way past annoying.

    My wife asked me to stop singing Wonderwall.
    I said maybe.....
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  • axisusaxisus Frets: 16271
    Nothing wrong with fade outs. On the right track of course.

    For me it's the stuff that Mrs A likes - Stock Aitken and Waterman, everything that they ever produced.
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  • steveledzepsteveledzep Frets: 772
    Rap.
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  • DeadmanDeadman Frets: 2882
    edited July 30
    Whiny female vocalists who release cover versions. There's one out at the moment, only Toploader's 'Dancing in the moonlight' but it's on all the bloody time. Fucking crap and still an absolute insult in my opinion.

    Edit; turns out Toploader covered it too (bastards!) :lol: 
    My trading feedback is here 
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  • CrankyCranky Frets: 31
    lasermonkey said:
    Another submission for those winsome, acoustic covers of dance, indie and classic rock songs that advertisers have been foisting on us for the last fifteen years. Ad makers! Can you come up with another idea, please? It's way past annoying.

    A third.

    I don't even care if it's a cover or an original.  The whole genre should disappear.  I've almost given up coffee because of it!
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  • Philly_QPhilly_Q Frets: 8321

    OK, this is a bit unkind and it's a phenomenon that's been somewhat forced by dire circumstances, but...

    ...."Lockdown songs" recorded in people's bedrooms with acoustic guitars.  Yes, we're back in whiney singer-songwriter territory again.

    Just because you're stuck in your bedroom doesn't mean you can't plug something in, program some drums and make a fucking racket, you wishy-washy bastards. 

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  • ReverendReverend Frets: 2318
    Christmas ad asthma songs are the worst. 
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  • zedhexzedhex Frets: 59
    Kinda predictable I know, but factory-produced bubblegum boy-band pop music usually induces the urge to vomit for me.
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  • Devil#20Devil#20 Frets: 56
    Anything that Robbie ****ing Williams has done including the one he always sings and has dined out on the back of it for years. James Blunt for the whiney voice and Kylie Minogue who's made millions by singing through her nose for years. She's looking a bit plastic nowdays but back in the day of those little golden hotpants I'd be mounting the TV if she came on. That brings me to the final one. What is it with a lot of female singers that they are unable to sing unless it's wearing just their grunters. Oh yeah...to distract from their lack of talent. Video killed the radio star. It certainly did. 

    Ian

    Lowering my expectations has succeeded beyond my wildest dreams.

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  • Danny1969Danny1969 Frets: 5173
    Every new release that keeps using the 1 \ 5 \ 6 \ 4 progression ... stop it !  we already have 3 million songs using that

    Ed Sheehan ..... has literally used the same boring formula now for 10 years. 
    www.2020studios.co.uk 
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  • vizviz Frets: 6499
    Extra beat in some bars of certain campfire and Elton John songs
    Misogyny ... enforces sexism by punishing those who reject an inferior status for women and rewarding those who accept it. - Guitartango
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  • scrumhalfscrumhalf Frets: 6844
    Using songs in adverts because of the title or one line in the lyrics whilst completely ignoring the entire song.

    As an example, someone is using the Beach Boys' "Wouldn't It Be Nice" for their ads, the premise being that their product/service (I forget which) makes things nice.

    Except that the song is about someone looking forward to marrying his girlfriend so they can have sex whenever they want.


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  • CirrusCirrus Frets: 5004
    HAL9000 said:

    A distant second is songs that fade out at the end. Come on - if you can come up with an interesting or imaginative beginning, you should be able to come up with an imaginative or interesting ending.
    One billion percent disagree with this, it's an argument I've had with people over the decades.  =)

    Fade outs are a perfectly valid way to end a studio track. Handled well they're an evocative and tasteful way of handling the fact that the music is being presented to the listener on a particular medium. It can be used to imply that your time with the song is at an end, but the song will go on after you've gone. It can be used to give a little glimpse into a band starting to loosen up during the fade, when you don't want that vibe to be the focus of the track. In complex arrangements, quite often different elements will be faded at different speeds, to re-frame the mix as the fades go on. It's far from a lazy cop out.

    Then there are the variations on the theme - when the main body of the song comes to an end but some elements carry on into a fade out. Or where the song is gradually faded into rising noise (R.E.M. "Hope", Elbow "Newborn"). Do you draw a line where some forms of fade are acceptable to you? How about the end of Holst's the Planets or other arrangements of choir music, where the singers physically leave the venue, taking their voices with them and creating the effect of the music fading away?

    And what about the fade in?  :o

    And also, where are these incredible endings? There are millions of tracks that don't fade out. And I'd say 95% of them end with either "and stop on the one after this repetition of the riff" or "have a bit of a rit" or "and do a drum fill now". Yeah, fades can be lazy but when done badly, they are no more lazy than any other form of ending that took 5 seconds to decide on, if it was explicitly planned at all

    I'd really like people who hate fadeouts to put their money where their mouth is and write a better ending for a famous track that fades out.
    Captain Horizon (my old band);
    Very (!) Occasional Blog
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  • fobfob Frets: 839
    Bad mastering.

    Exemplified by the loudness wars, this is really just contempt for the fans.
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  • lasermonkeylasermonkey Frets: 1888
    @cirrus absolutely bang-on there!
    My wife asked me to stop singing Wonderwall.
    I said maybe.....
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  • RedlesterRedlester Frets: 130
    Totally agree with Cirrus re fadeouts. Not only are they a perfectly legitimate and musically valid way of ending a track, from a practical point of view they lend themselves to broadcasting. 








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  • dindudedindude Frets: 7041
    Music that hits the buffers from the off and has no dynamics, no excuse not even in pop songs. My kids have been listening to Katy Perry, possible the best (worst) example of this.
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  • BellycasterBellycaster Frets: 4143
    Singers who demonstrate their incredible vocal control by embellishing every single note instead of singing me a goddamn tune.
    Is this what I call "Warbling"?
    "We don't want more people from Sheffield flying away on cheap Holidays" Oliver Letwin 2011.
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  • UnclePsychosisUnclePsychosis Frets: 7881
    This is maybe a comment on guitarists more than music but I (generally) hate music that's written by guitarists, for guitarists. 
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  • LitterickLitterick Frets: 86
    Glasto anthems.
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  • stickyfiddlestickyfiddle Frets: 14831
    Whiny singers. For example, I want to love the Smashing Pumpkins and I think they had some really great songs. I've tried, but I can't do it.
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  • GrumpyrockerGrumpyrocker Frets: 1633
    edited August 2
    • Fadeouts. There's a reason Sorrow live is better, it ends properly.
    • Guest vocalists whose sole contribution is to go "oh yeah" "uha" "that's right" etc.
    • The millennial whoop
    • Eight/nine-string metal riffing. Leave some space for your bass player please. If your riff isn't heavy on a standard tuned 6-string, it's probably a shit riff.
    • Metal where you can't hear the bass guitar
    • That bit in metal videos where the screen shakes like Saving Private Ryan just because someone plays a heavy riff
    • The assumption (often by the BBC) that Glasto covers "all" music. 
    • Pop singers who cram as many notes as possible and at great length into just one word
    • The crappy backing tracks some guitar instrumentalists create instead of writing complete songs. Love Satch, but his early work is very guilty of this. 
    • Queen
    • Yes I'll join everyone else with songs that have been John Lewissed
    • Metal gatekeeping - yes the singer is a girl, no that doesn't mean it's "just" pop music, fuck off
    • The lack of widespread recognition of the brilliance of Adrian Smith.  
    • The shouty bloke from the B52s. What's that about?
    • That Ronnie James Dio is dead

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  • JonathangusJonathangus Frets: 650
    Singers who demonstrate their incredible vocal control by embellishing every single note instead of singing me a goddamn tune.
    Is this what I call "Warbling"?
    Not heard it called that, but this, basically:
    • Pop singers who cram as many notes as possible and at great length into just one word

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