Anyone had to overcome stage fright playing live?

The_Bri_Minister

It’s not the most natural thing for me to stand up in front of people and do anything, but as a rule I’ve always found the more people the better. If somewhere is packed full of people enjoying themselves I feel much less self conscious than if there’s just a handful of people standing watching with their arms folded. Have played a few local festivals with decent size crowds on a proper stage and always found that much easier than that feeling of being crammed into the corner of a pub with people right in your face. I really struggle with that at times.

Keefy

Anyone else get gig-preparedness anxiety dreams btw?

I frequently dream that I am running late, I've forgotten some or all of my kit, my guitar is broken, or even that I have been booked to play sax or trombone!

Kebabkid

Public speaking but I've learnt that rehearsing it and even doing a dry run with someone has helped.

Live was never an issue, even for some of the bigger things I've done in the past but in the last couple of years, something odd has happened and as such, I turned down a really good opportunity with a good bunch of musicians and friends playing exactly the type of music I love. I worried about gear breaking down, having a spare rig, ballsing things up etc and couldn't even commit to the auditions and was getting night sweats and panic attacks thinking about it. To this day, I'm saddened by it but have accepted that I would be a liability to a band if I felt like that and it's not what they need.

I've tried to evaluate the cause. Is it the lack of playing live on a regular basis - I used to play most weeks or a couple of times a month and now it's around 6-8 times a year and even then, most of those are bass gigs and not guitar ones and that was all before lockdown. Coincidentally, I also lost my Father around that time but I can't see the link there. It's not nice to be crippled/limited by something like this but equally difficult to snap out of it.

Someone suggested Toastmasters, which is more about public speaking but a step in the right direction

https://www.toastmasters.org/

I hope those suffering get to where they want to with this

axisus

slacker said:

axisus said:

slacker said:
Three years later I played a lot of gigs to ever increasing amounts of people. I played bass in two carol services in  Luton Town Football club first year 5000 people, second year 10000 people. 

One of them Luton Carol Aid 1989?

slacker said:
For a time a knew a professional footballer that became a church minister. 

Alan West?

Yes to both.

As you may guess, I live in Luton! Actually I did the graphics for Carol Aid - designed the logo, did a couple of postmarks for Royal Mail, posters etc. I was all pre-computer days so drawing by hand, sticking words on etc!

G4pei

Great discussion. I think stage fright is part of every 'performers' pre gig feeling and I don't think its necessarily a bad thing so  long as it can be kept under control. I don't profess to have the answer as on occasion I get very frustrated at tensing up and choking (not literally) when playing live and not playing with so much flow as I do when I'm noodling at home! I also get nervous when I recognise one of my guitar playing peers in the audience! I have noticed that top guitar players have a very relaxed playing style. One great example is Jack Pearson who is almost horizontal but his playing is so fluid and dynamic at the same time. I suppose its the 10,000 hours of practice that helps!

pintspiller

Problems with the set should be sorted during rehearsals. Make a checklist of the gear you need and check it twice before you leave for gig/rendezvous.

My first gig was a party held by my first band and I forgot how to start the first song. I've used cheatsheets ever since. I rarely look at them now.

Keefy

pintspiller said:

Problems with the set should be sorted during rehearsals. Make a checklist of the gear you need and check it twice before you leave for gig/rendezvous.

My first gig was a party held by my first band and I forgot how to start the first song. I've used cheatsheets ever since. I rarely look at them now.

Absolutely. Eliminate as many problems as possible before you step out of your front door. That includes knowing the songs inside out.

slacker

pintspiller said:

My first gig was a party held by my first band and I forgot how to start the first song. 

I've started a song a tone flat. Keyboard player looked at me in horror. I gave a 4 count and we hit the right note together. Would have worked if the sax player was awake. I think the audience thought it was jazz.

I also started a song with the bass riff back to front. Drummer purposely missed his queue and let me sort it. Flipped the notes and gave him a 4 count.

I've also done things where the singers have come in half a bar early. In both cases we followed the drummer with a two beat bar.

I don't get nervous when I know how to get out of a muck up and my band members help and vice versa. Playing in Ab is fun when the keyboard player left the transpose button on.

west

I wrote this a a few years ago in another stage fright thread ...

"

A relativly recent ( 1 1/2 yrs ago ) 2018  experience really affected me deeply ... a seasond pro of some 30 odd years several hundred gigs some prestigeous sessions teaching/ colledge/ students  etc who never really experienced stage fright ( just a few butterflies ) i went to my mates pub's open mic ...

i hadn't played live for some 7 yrs or so , it was like the walk to the gallows as i clutched my lowden a wooden box with wires ( nothing to hide behind not even a voice ) to the stage area ... 

i managed to pull off the performance by sheer will , my own compositions ( some are tricky ) and a couple of arrangements . i have never felt so bad in my life , hands shook so much i could hardly perform , had to edit and simplify on the fly to get through it , dread to think what the old B.P was like, a truely unpleasent experience almost verging on panic attack ...

i was So angry with myself later on , im not sure if i will bother again , maybe i built it up a bit too much lol  oh that and age may play a part . i think i truly got a flavour of what it must be like for a comedian or an actor delivering a monologue or one man/woman show,  its just You !  if you fuck up its You ! talk about exposed ....

i havnt played live since ..... and not sure if i will .....  i wonder if it would be the same if was a band type situation rather than a solo gig .. mmm

Blueingreen

It's odd but I find my playing sometimes falls to pieces if I'm unexpectedly playing in front of one or two other people but I've played in front of quite big crowds without any problems.

Just a couple of weeks ago I had a tech do some work on a guitar and when I went to pick it up and was checking it through his amp I felt weirdly self conscious and made a complete mess of playing little bits and pieces I can normally play easily, including "forgetting" bits I can usually play in my sleep.

What I do find with gigs is I'm more nervous if I haven't been playing regularly or if I do a gig that's a "step up in class" compared to what I've been doing recently - eg supporting a name act instead of a gig in a local pub.  But these butterflies don't usually affect my playing badly and I settle after a song or two.

I also think so much of this is self-perception.  If you're playing at 95% of your normal standard you can be excruciatingly conscious of that missing 5% but nobody else is likely to notice the difference.  I've lost count of the number of times I've come off stage thinking "well that was a bit shit" only to be confronted by people congratulating us on a great gig.

AK99

Yes - if you include those times when you're the only customer in the local guitar shop, and you really want to try that interesting looking SG - and all of the staff are on duty, standing around idly scratching their nether regions..

Keefy

Actually I do sometimes get ‘stage fright’ - when I’m sitting in on bass in a big band rehearsal, and a section comes up marked SOLO. I suddenly feel like the rest of the band is checking out my sight-reading and finding me sadly wanting…

HAL9000

G4pei said:

I also get nervous when I recognise one of my guitar playing peers in the audience!

Yup. Went to a blues/soul jam thingy the other week and Innes Sibun was there. (Not that I could even remotely come close to claiming to be his peer!). Slightly unnerving.

vasselmeyer

I first played live in the early 1990s at a mates birthday party when he hired the local music venue. It was my first time playing in public and I was absolutely shitting myself. It was a blues band so nothing too complicated but I was in my early twenties and had never stood up and spoken or played in public ever before, unless you count being Jack in my primary school's assembly where we put on Jack and the Beanstalk for the rest of the school.

We played for maybe 40 minutes and I when I came off I remembered nothing about the gig at all, although I was still vibrating madly and could hardly hold a pint without it slopping all over the edge of the glass. A bunch of people came up afterwards and said "That was great...I can't believe that was your band's first gig". I just thought "Well, if no-one noticed, there's no point in being nervous. You can clearly play in public." and have never felt nervous for a band gig since.

I did feel a few butterflies on my first open mic gig where I had to sing as well, and I'd never sung anything in public before, other than backing vocals. There's no hiding on a solo acoustic number. Again, I did OK and just thought..."Fair enough. You can do that as well".

• Some thoughts, not in any order:
• Rehearse your songs until muscle memory takes over
• Pick easy songs for your first number, we even do that in my current band
• Know your limitations and don't go outside them until you know you can rescue yourself
• Have spares of vital equipment or a backup plan if something fails
• Remember that most of the audience will have no clue if you cock up
• Have fun, because otherwise, why are you doing it?

When we're allowed, anyone who's nervous about performing should try and get to one of the fretboard jams. At every one I've been to, people have been unbelievably supportive in helping others get through.

markslade07

HAL9000 said:

G4pei said:

I also get nervous when I recognise one of my guitar playing peers in the audience!

Yup. Went to a blues/soul jam thingy the other week and Innes Sibun was there. (Not that I could even remotely come close to claiming to be his peer!). Slightly unnerving.

Yeh, I saw that advertised thinking I might go and give it a bash one day. Watched the videos back of Innes playing (and others of course) and ummmm.....no. Just no.

Stratavarious

Public speaking terrifies me.. i will be taking beta blockers, got the dry mouth and tight chest and everything..  so it was hell that my work (pre Brexit fucking my R&D career) needed me to speak on the biggest stages at research conferences to hundreds of people cleverer than me. Gives me nightmares.

But if I strap on a guitar for a gig or do a high pressure theatre show, I have no anxieties at all and will usually play a lot better to a big audience, and take risks on solos too - it just seems to flow out like watching a movie play out.  Some lower level adrenaline effect maybe. 

So you can’t really know till you try.   

Hard to judge why, as I would certainly call myself socially anxious and I actively avoid parties.. but I think with guitar, the number of people in the audience who could do better than me on stage is very small and they are just up for a good time anyway.  It is not the same as interacting with peers or to small groups where you, rather than enjoying the entertainment together, is the focus.

 I do think I somehow found a way to ‘hide’ behind the guitar and the playing in crowds.   With lots of live experience you can also play yourself out of problems and improvise fixes that sound planned.   So being well practiced and practically skilled in making a good recovery if you screw up, is massively confidence boosting too.  I sometimes get a mild panic a bar before a tricky bit thinking I have completely forgotten it.. then it comes straight out by itself from muscle memory.

Then at the end there is the praise and the impressed girls, even if you think you played mediocre.  

You have to see the positives and just focus on that....  and practice.

Hootsmon

How in the hell someone like Brian May (on his own too) can play a solo on top of Windsor castle live to millions is beyond me

It's a bit like playin' the last black ball at snooker for the world championship and a million bucks.....yet some folk can do it

damn, I'm impressed

FarleyUK

Yeah, I still get it everytime. It manifests itself in me looking waaaaay too serious when I'm playing - but that's purely because I'm trying to concentrate (as well as trying to do the FoH mix and our in-ear mix).

I think if you don't get nervous, it means you either aren't bothered about putting on a good gig OR you're so bloody good and full of confidence you don't need to worry.

digitalscream

vasselmeyer said:

• Some thoughts, not in any order:
• Rehearse your songs until muscle memory takes over
• Pick easy songs for your first number, we even do that in my current band
• Know your limitations and don't go outside them until you know you can rescue yourself
• Have spares of vital equipment or a backup plan if something fails
• Remember that most of the audience will have no clue if you cock up
• Have fun, because otherwise, why are you doing it?

This is all good advice - basically, rehearse until you know exactly what's happening at all times, and how you'll rescue it if something doesn't quite come off. That gives you a confidence that you wouldn't know you had - when you know that there's absolutely nothing that could happen during the performance that you don't have a plan to handle.

I also find that shrinking my world to become exactly the size of the stage helps; that's all you need to be aware of, in practical terms. Quite often, you'll be blinded by the stage lights if you try to look out anyway (at least, in the venues we play) - you'll often not be able to see much past the front row.

The part that terrifies me is when people come up and want to talk to me afterwards, particularly when they're waiting at the side of the stage when my brain's sorting through everything that just happened.

LastMantra

Probably part of why there's been such a history of people developing drink/drug problems. Even if it's not whisky and smack apparently beta-blockers are commonly used. 
I'm pretty sure people, even on game shows or whatever, are still encouraged to have a g and t or two before a show.