Friday humour

Haych

A wife and her husband were discussing government cutbacks.

"Steve, I hear the government is going to trim down the military forces by eliminating six old destroyers."

The husband replied, "I'm so sorry to hear that, dear. I'm sure you'll miss your mother."

rogd

bluecat

Love it.

Tannin

  
 

snowblind

swiller said:

Official Trump campaign material..I wish i was joking.
https://www.facebook.com/reel/1557750021840124

The funny part is that in reality Trump can't drive and if his golf is anything to go by there's no way he's hitting anything with a bow and arrow.

Winny_Pooh

swiller

swiller

Kittyfrisk

Bit of a niche bus stop.

Kittyfrisk

Tannin

bluecat

Mother in-law came round for tea last night, half way through the meal she said why is the dog staring at me. I said you have got his plate.

HAL9000

My wife asked for something more up to date than her i-Pad  so I bought her a J-cloth.

Lebarque

I took the shell off my racing snail hoping it would make him go faster, but I have to admit he seems more sluggish now.

Emp_Fab

Can we change tack from the old misogynist jokes please ?  It's 2024, not 1974.  We've had a picture of a woman being called a fat cunt (in effect) - I'm sure whoever she is she didn't agree to be turned into an internet joke, then a joke about a mother-in-law being given a dog's plate to eat from followed by a joke implying a wife is better off with a cleaning cloth.

What's next - Jim Davidson's 'Chalky' jokes ?

bluecat

Time you had a sense of humour transplant I fear.

DefaultM

I struggled to find the Aldi one funny when it just seems to be a photo of a normal person. She’s probably conscious of it and I wouldn’t like to feel uncomfortable about something and then one day find someone made a meme out of me for it.

Emp_Fab

bluecat said:

Time you had a sense of humour transplant I fear.

Time you realised that your sense of humour died in the late 1970's.

Why the fuck would anyone want a transplant so they could find jokes about women, mothers-in-law and 'P*kis' funny ?

Philly_Q

Emp_Fab said:

bluecat said:

Time you had a sense of humour transplant I fear.

Time you realised that your sense of humour died in the late 1970's.

Why the fuck would anyone want a transplant so they could find jokes about women, mothers-in-law and 'P*kis' funny ?

I don't think anyone has made jokes about 'P*kis'.  Calm down.

swiller

Emp_Fab said:

Can we change tack from the old misogynist jokes please ?  It's 2024, not 1974.  We've had a picture of a woman being called a fat cunt (in effect) - I'm sure whoever she is she didn't agree to be turned into an internet joke.

Nope, coincidence its a woman and would have been equally funny if it was ruth from bristol with a picture of her (fat) husband. If you are offended, your problem.