Deserted Island Discs

HAL9000 · September 2014

OK, se we've had Desert Island Discs where you got to choose eight tracks that you could listen to for the years stranded on a desert island. But what about those eight tracks that, to you, are the musical equivalent of fingernails being scraped across a blackboard...?

For me...

Deck of Cards - I think it was performed by Max Bygraves amongst others - I'd rather remove my own intestines using a rusty teaspoon

Floral Dance - Sir Terry Wogan

Long Haired Lover From Liverpool - Little Jimmy Osmond

Anyone Can Fall in Love - Anita Dobson

My Heart Will Go On - Celine Dion

Dick A Dum Dum - Des O'Connor

Macarena - Los Del Rio

Mr Tambourine Man - William Shatner

Luxury Item - Earplugs

Phil_aka_Pip · September 2014

Stone me, that's even harder than choosing stuff out of what I DO like. There's so much more I don't like. Easier to give generalised classifications...

"Rap"
"HipHop"
"modern (plinkyplonk) classical"
most (but not all) chart stuff
"easy listening"
"country"
"metal" of the kind that sounds like it's being "sung" by Klingons (whatever you call it)
"grunge"

luxury item = a large hammer (to ensure that I don't have to hear this stuff)

Philly_Q · September 2014

I don't know about picking out 8 tracks, but all the formularised top 40 pop/dance music I have somehow accidentally managed to hear in the last few years. I gave up following the charts years ago, I could no more fly to the Moon than name anything that's been Number One this decade, but as far as I can tell it's ALL SHITE.

Oh, and:

Mr Loverman - Shabba Ranks.

stickyfiddle · September 2014

Build Me Up Buttercup - The Foundations

ABC - Jackson 5 , purely because it's first alphabetically on my iphone so it's what my car decides to play every time I plug my phone in.

End of the Century - Blur. "There's ants in the carpet"? Fuck off.

Run - Leona Lewis. Crap cover of an ok song. Has she done anything since?

Hallelujah - Any version except the Cohen and Buckley ones. Enough, already.

24 hours from Tulsa - Gene Pitney. It's the voice that does it.

All of the Smashing Pumpkins back catalogue. It starts like good rock music and then he sings and it all goes wrong and I wish my ears were broken.

HAL9000 · September 2014

Just thought of two more...

If - Telly Savalas

Nobody's Child - Not sure who this one's by, but a mawkish song that was played a fair bit on the radio when I was a kid. No redeeming features whatsoever.

jonnyburgo · September 2014

Anything by U2, Bongo looks like he's acting, I don't think he has any genuine rock bones.

Gassage · September 2014

Loving this, so:

Top of my list by a mile

1Thing by Amerie.

This song is absolutely deplorable.

Then
Firework- Katy fucking Perry
Superb Ass- Nikki Minge-ass
Happy- Pharrell Williams
Welcome Home- Peters and Lee
Single Lady- Be-ouncy
Get Lucky- Daft Punk
99 Problems - the incredibly talentless Jay Zed.

Luxury Item:

50g of M Kat to remove all pain

Deadman · September 2014

Anything by Dido.

And that Move like Jagger crap. I truly despise it.

And that Gangnam(?) Style crap. What a load of bollocks.

chillidoggy · September 2014

Jazz

U2

Rap

Any boy band shite

Any girl band shite

God rock

Deth metal

Anything remotely connected to Eurovision

Anything on Radio 1

richardhomer · September 2014

To paraphrase Sybil Fawlty,"Loud music, quiet music, happy music, sad music, aggressive music, gentle music... It's hard to find any music she likes, really".

Bellycaster · September 2014

Harry Chapin - W.O.L.D (Aaaaargh that fuckin song)

Foundations - Build me up Buttercup

D-Ream - Anything by this act.

Beyoncé - Crazy in Love (Can't stand this song)

Reynolds Girls - I'd rather Jack (I wonder what they are doing now they've JACKED it in)?

ELO - Hold on Tight (Some ELO songs are fantastic, but when they do "Naff" they do it better than most)

Norman Greenbaum - Spirit in the Sky

Most Rap and Hip Hop

My brain usually blocks out this stuff to protect me from Suicide, it's being gruelling recalling them.

;-)

thecolourbox · September 2014

Worship songs, in particular anything Graham Kendrick. Pure limp wristed drivel.

Windmills of your mind, Noel Harrison.

Anything Eric Clapton

Don't stop me now, Queen. Always guaranteed to hear it when you're having the shittest day ever

Let it Be, the Beatles

Anything Mumford and sons or where the band stand hump backed as a group

Any busker I've ever heard

That new Ella Henderson song, or any equivalent around at any given time (edit, this covers all songs where the verse is too low for the singer so they warble it, then the chorus is too high so they end up shouting it)

jonnyburgo · September 2014

Floppy haired Indie,faux folk singer songwriters / bands that sing in slightly posh home counties accents.

George Ezra and his affected voice gets on my tits.

chillidoggy · September 2014

Dido.

richardhomer · September 2014

jonnyburgo;353446" said:
Floppy haired Indie,faux folk singer songwriters / bands that sing in slightly posh home counties accents.

George Ezra and his affected voice gets on my tits.

Where do you stand on Nick Drake (who was all of these things, except 'indie')?

jonnyburgo · September 2014

richardhomer said:

jonnyburgo;353446" said:
Floppy haired Indie,faux folk singer songwriters / bands that sing in slightly posh home counties accents.

George Ezra and his affected voice gets on my tits.
Where do you stand on Nick Drake (who was all of these things, except 'indie')?

I love Nick Drake. That's different though, his songs are timeless.

Clarky · September 2014

my god... only 8 songs.. that's just so unfair..

the Birdie Song would have to be on the list..

the remaining 7 will need careful thought.. there are so many songs to choose from

Phil_aka_Pip · September 2014

Clarky said:

my god... only 8 songs.. that's just so unfair..
the Birdie Song would have to be on the list..
the remaining 7 will need careful thought.. there are so many songs to choose from

Thats why I took a swipe at whole genres ...

Clarky · September 2014

but the specs of thread limits us to songs...

that means that on the desert island, you'll be hearing all the shit songs except for the 8 your deemed most shit..

that means you selection has to be seriously considered...

dumping entire genres is far too easy..

Phil_aka_Pip · September 2014

Clarky said:

but the specs of thread limits us to songs...
that means that on the desert island, you'll be hearing all the shit songs except for the 8 your deemed most shit..
that means you selection has to be seriously considered...
dumping entire genres is far too easy..

but as much as I can be bothered with, when I'm just using this forum as punctuation between tasks in my day job

holnrew · September 2014

Over 50s in don't like rap shocker.

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