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Sorry to bother you again, but what's the one at the beginning of Hard Day's Night?
Cheers etc
We would like to take this opportunity to remind you that, contrary to what you may think, it is company policy that your remuneration package as a kitchen fitter is dependent on your work-rate. And, in response to your query, sadly it will not be possible to pay you in 'chicks'.
Sincerely, Currys HR dept
Personally I like the red but whatever, paint it any colour you like.
Marianne xx
Would you mind showing me those fancy chords?
Many thanks
Gassage (strictly lead guitar)
*An Official Foo-Approved guitarist since Sept 2023.
Dear J Holland
I can span an octave on a piano and I know you can't... and you know what they say about men with big hands and small hands, eh?
The Gass.
*An Official Foo-Approved guitarist since Sept 2023.
Dear Master Alex Turner,
C/O Mr & Mrs Turner
I am 35 and you guys are about 15. Quite frankly I am nearer your Dad's age. Not only am I anti-gambling but you are clearly too young to indulge in it legally. Therefore whilst I would gladly take your wager, confident in disproving your theory surrounding your views of my dance floor moves I shall pass on the grounds of both legal and moral responsibility.
Just to clarify I was not as you chose to view it "making eyes at you" I was in fact looking on in disapproval at you dropping expensive audio equipment.
You are however correct in that my name is indeed not 'Rio', but then I don't really think I look much like a Rio so maybe that was a lucky guess.
I hope Santa brings you all you want for Christmas. Be good for Mummy and Daddy.
Your sincerely,
RHC
It's all very well immortalising your 'Big Log' in song, but please spare a thought for the poor plumber who had to dislodge it from your u-bend.
Yours,
Skarloeyjet Drain Services.
Further to your enquiry about their behaviour towards their offspring, we have completed a comprehensive investigation into your neighbours, Mr and Mrs Kusznetsov, and have reached the conclusion that they do indeed love their children too.
Thanks, The NSPCC
I just thought I'd let you know that I sing along to your popular song 'Set Them Free' using the words 'Trees trees, save de trees oh-wo'.
This is essentially me taking the p1ss out of you.
Hope Trudie's well and still enjoying all the tantric stuff.
Kind regards,
Richard
They make a great presenter for 'You've Been Framed'?