Things that are guaranteed to put you off an eBay listing

Barrivee

Lodes off spellin mistacks

fretfinder

lasermonkey said:

robgilmo said:

Then there is ''worked last time I used it before I put it in the loft 3 years ago'' , well just fecking plug it in then and see if it still works? Oh, let me guess, you already did, and it didn't. 

Very much this. Every pedal I've bought with a similar description didn't work.

You mean you've bought pedals on that basis more than once...?!  

Gassage

The deal killer for me is if @HarrySeven has linked it on here.

HarrySeven

Gassage said:

The deal killer for me is if @HarrySeven has linked it on here.

Well...a link from me is indeed The Gold Seal of Shiteness. Have a Wisdom, Mr. Gassage.

lasermonkey

fretfinder said:

lasermonkey said:

robgilmo said:

Then there is ''worked last time I used it before I put it in the loft 3 years ago'' , well just fecking plug it in then and see if it still works? Oh, let me guess, you already did, and it didn't. 

Very much this. Every pedal I've bought with a similar description didn't work.

You mean you've bought pedals on that basis more than once...?!  

I have, expecting that they won't work, and fixed them.
 I've also bought plenty where it said that the pedals were tested only to find, upon discovering that the pedal didn't work, to be told "it worked the last time I used it in 1986 and just assumed it was still ok".
 So, not tested then.
 It takes five minutes, ffs.

cbakay

This ones amazing!

He had me at "bid I'd u agree"

http://m.ebay.co.uk/itm/MARKET-DYNA-COMP-PEDAL-GUITAR-FX-RARE-RED-USED-UNTESTED-MUSIC-STUDIO-LIVE-/401305502064?hash=item5d6fac0170:g:WSoAAOSwc-tY6g6d&_trkparms=pageci%3A3bb7ba11-1f3a-11e7-b69b-74dbd180b927%7Cparentrq%3A6076fe5d15b0a2abc5ac16e8fffa79fb%7Ciid%3A1

Sassafras

cbakay said:

This ones amazing!

He had me at "bid I'd u agree"

http://m.ebay.co.uk/itm/MARKET-DYNA-COMP-PEDAL-GUITAR-FX-RARE-RED-USED-UNTESTED-MUSIC-STUDIO-LIVE-/401305502064?hash=item5d6fac0170:g:WSoAAOSwc-tY6g6d&_trkparms=pageci%3A3bb7ba11-1f3a-11e7-b69b-74dbd180b927%7Cparentrq%3A6076fe5d15b0a2abc5ac16e8fffa79fb%7Ciid%3A1

One look at his feedback should give you some idea of what to expect.

steer

Adverts that tell you the girls name that they call the guitar. FFS, I don't want to you that you call you guitar Sandra. Makes my skin crawl. 

impmann

What a miserable bunch of wankers you lot are today!

A point for @Voxman - it may be that eBay insist on you offering Paypal (which may or may not be a bit naughty depending on how you view such monopolies things) but to insist on cash, when something is for collection only is COMMON SENSE. And if someone doesn't want to pay as such, then go buy from someone else.

The only things that "puts me off" an advert are:

1) price too high
2) obviously dodgy/hooky/fake
3) dodgy feedback

Oh and I'm not mad keen on those adverts where they photograph the guitar with a semi-naked girl draped around it... it just smacks of exploitation and a little bit creepy. I mean, did they pay the 'model'? Is the model their wife, daughter or employee? Its just a bit... odd.

UnclePsychosis

Most of my pets hates have been covered but one that annoys me is one where the seller has a list of "TERMS AND CONDITIONS" that is about fifteen pages long that dictate all the utterly ludicrous and utterly non-binding faff they want you to agree to. No mate, if its broken when I get it I'm returning it and no, I will not agree to only place a bid after having first sent you a message via carrier pigeon or whatever other nonsense your deranged brain has dreamt up.

Rox

"Information about these guitars available on the internet."

Well, you're trying to sell the bastard thing, it's not much effort to copy and paste it you numpty!

"These are the better quality ones made in Kuala Lumpur, before manufacturing moved to Malaysia."

Uh uh.  Huh?

"I bought this brand new in 1973.."

No you didn't.  You bought it on Ebay last week.  Completed listings says so.  You're even using the same pictures!  And it was made in 1992 FFS.

Any listing that makes Bigfoot and Nessie photographs look crisp and clean.

Sassafras

"From a smoke and pet free environment".

You being a joyless, cold hearted, controlling health freak doesn't make it any more valuable to me.

Voxman

impmann said:

A point for @Voxman - it may be that eBay insist on you offering Paypal (which may or may not be a bit naughty depending on how you view such monopolies things) but to insist on cash, when something is for collection only is COMMON SENSE. And if someone doesn't want to pay as such, then go buy from someone else.

Oh and I'm not mad keen on those adverts where they photograph the guitar with a semi-naked girl draped around it.

When its cash on collection I wholeheartedly agree with you! 

Now, about those semi-naked girls...I'm obviously looking at the wrong ads 'cos I've never seen those - so please do post some! 

BenSirAmos

Beloved

gubble

"These usually go for £x" - no it will sell for what it's worth to someone for this exact one.

"It was played recently by <insert famousish guitarist>'s tech who said it was the best guitar he'd ever played"

Neil

Sassafras said:

"From a smoke and pet free environment".

You being a joyless, cold hearted, controlling health freak doesn't make it any more valuable to me.

It would to me.

I don't want a guitar (and case) smelling of stale fags and cat wee thanks.

fandango

"nice"

"Not [PRS/Gibson/Fender]" in title, just so it shows up in your searches.

"Stunning" and other hyperbole nonsense.

"One of a kind"

"Tremolo bar missing, you can buy one separately"

Comments like "neck bent like a swan's, but I'm not going to fix it"

Winny_Pooh

Sassafras said:

"From a smoke and pet free environment".

You being a joyless, cold hearted, controlling health freak doesn't make it any more valuable to me.

Agreed, makes you wonder what did they do with poor doggo? 

usedtobe

Neil said:

Sassafras said:

"From a smoke and pet free environment".

You being a joyless, cold hearted, controlling health freak doesn't make it any more valuable to me.

It would to me.

I don't want a guitar (and case) smelling of stale fags and cat wee thanks.

Weirdo!


  

mattblair

Philly_Q said:

"Pictures to follow"

Guilty of this but it's more of a reflection of my forum browsing in work...

With regards to couriers, the only one I've found who state they cover instruments with the insurance they provide is Transglobal Express - seem to be a reseller of other couriers but the insurance is their own. It's pricey but if you're shipping experience guitars it's worth it!