Guitar terms you refuse to use

BigMonka

I have a strong dislike, to the point of never using, things like:
"Plec" - as either use pick or plectrum, plec is just a horrible word
"Axe" - it's not an axe. end of.
"stompbox" - that's the kind of phrase my mum would use but I've never really heard a proper guitarist use. It's just an effects pedal.

What are your guitar term bugbears? 

Jack_

Shred/Shredding/Shredder.

darthed1981

"Player Grade" when describing a ludicrously valued vintage guitar, as if anything else is beneath the contempt of an actual player.

"Catnip for rich bastards" - I fixed it

octatonic

Wang bar.

Whitecat

Plays like butter

impmann

"My Tech" - he's not "yours"

"Rig" - I don't work on an oil platform

"Wang bar" - I mean, seriously?

"Plays like butter" - soft, squidgy and smelling faintly of cow juice?

Sassafras

Tone.
I don't know why, I just hate the word. I much prefer 'sound'.

breakstuff

'She' when describing a guitar.

Whitecat

impmann said:

"My Tech" - he's not "yours"

Neither is your GP but it's not weird to say "my doctor."

Sassafras

Vintage.
It always means it's 3 times what it's actually worth.

BigMonka

I'd forgotten wang bar - that's proper hilarious.

Bridgehouse

"I've found the one, I don't need another guitar ever again, this is it, the search is over."

And the corresponding paradox:

"This is the best I've ever played, but I'm selling it as I want a Telejazzstangcaster"

adamm82

I have the opposite problem I started using guitar lingo in my normal life. My friend was asking about the stereo in my car and if I had changed anything. I said no the car is all stock. 

Lestratcaster

"down up down up" Doesn't tell me how many bars it is or what time signature

richardhomer

Lester, rig, Doozy, three-thirty-five, 'verb...

impmann

Whitecat said:

impmann said:

"My Tech" - he's not "yours"

Neither is your GP but it's not weird to say "my doctor."

I say I'm going to "the doctor" not "my doctor".

Hey ho.

Bridgehouse

richardhomer said:

Lester, rig, Doozy, three-thirty-five, 'verb...

"I've got GAS for a Terry Morgan.." no?

Whitecat

oops delete

stickyfiddle

darthed1981 said:

"Player Grade" when describing a ludicrously valued vintage guitar, as if anything else is beneath the contempt of an actual player.

"Catnip for rich bastards" - I fixed it

That's not what player grade means - it refers to something old but not original - new pickups, or a refin or whatever, so you can still play it without risking a single ding costing you 2k...

Bridgehouse

impmann said:

Whitecat said:

impmann said:

"My Tech" - he's not "yours"

Neither is your GP but it's not weird to say "my doctor."

I say I'm going to "the doctor" not "my doctor".

Hey ho.

And is it bigger on the inside than the outside?

octatonic

Whitecat said:

impmann said:

"My Tech" - he's not "yours"

Neither is your GP but it's not weird to say "my doctor."

"I'm taking the wife to the doctor to have the breasts enlarged"