What’s the most embarrassing thing that happened to you recently?

adamm82

I had a flat tire and whilst changing it yesterday.
I really had to give it some force to get it off.

I gave it my all it came off, but I was crouched down so I sort of stublmed backwards and ended up doing a backwards roll ended up 5 feet away from the car. Oh and it was pouring down too. 

boogieman

I did the classic “oh good, nobody’s in the room, I’m safe to drop a noisy fart” before realising my sister in law was standing right behind me. 

Paul_C

Not that I can think of, I'm afraid, but I have a friend who is useless at anything car-related who phoned me up back in the summer because he was trying to get a wheel off his car, he'd already managed to make a serious cut in his hand somehow.

I put the correct tool in the car and drove round to his house. When I arrived I asked for a piece of wood, placed it against the wheel and hit it once with the lump hammer I'd brought with me, the wheel then fell gracefully to the floor.

Sassafras

Having sex with my girlfriend and realising that everyone on the bus was looking at us.

57Deluxe

/\ fucking Bus Drivers...

mikeyrob73

Sassafras said:

Having sex with my girlfriend and realising that everyone on the bus was looking at us.

Same, she is a goer your girlfriend 

Bridgehouse

mikeyrob73 said:

Sassafras said:

Having sex with my girlfriend and realising that everyone on the bus was looking at us.

Same, she is a goer your girlfriend 

Bus wanker

Foster

adamm82 said:

I had a flat tire and whilst changing it yesterday.
I really had to give it some force to get it off.

I gave it my all it came off, but I was crouched down so I sort of stublmed backwards and ended up doing a backwards roll ended up 5 feet away from the car. Oh and it was pouring down too. 

This is why you put the wrench on and then stamp on it. Even easier if you get one of those cheap extendable ones (then use a speed brace to finish the job)

Kilgore

I would rather not go into detail but it took them an hour in A & E to get the Hoover nozzle off.

thermionic

I went to see my GP and he told me I needed to stop masturbating.

He said it was upsetting the other patients in the waiting room.

axisus

adamm82 said:

I had a flat tire and whilst changing it yesterday.
I really had to give it some force to get it off.

I gave it my all it came off, but I was crouched down so I sort of stublmed backwards and ended up doing a backwards roll ended up 5 feet away from the car. Oh and it was pouring down too. 

Lucky you weren't on the hard shoulder.

Maynehead

I sold 2 guitars on here not long ago, pretty much at the same time.

Boxed them up, printed off the shipping labels, sent them off together on the same day... Next day I got a message from one of the buyers, along the lines of: “Got the guitar, very well packed, great condition, but unfortunately not the one I bought!”

I’d only gone and stuck the labels on the wrong bloody guitars.

After much cursing and apologising I ended up paying for another 2 couriers to swap the guitars round again

jamiexsilver

About this time last year my missus decided we needed some new Christmas lights so we went to a shop called the range.
When ever I go to that particular shop I go down the kitchen utensils isle and wind 2 or 3 egg timers up full and walk off.
This day I went for it, There must have been 20 of them after I'd wound them all up and put them back I turned round to see a member of the range staff just staring at me disapprovingly. I felt like a right bellend, I walked off and found my missus who then decided she would look all round the shop as slow as possible, The member of staff that caught me followed us round the shop the whole time. 

Nitefly

Fell arse over tit walking down the drive at my son's house on Saturday night, in the freezing fog.

It felt like it was happening in slow motion - first I lost my footing, then landed on my flabby arse, then my back and shoulders, and finally cracked the back of my head on the deck.

Hopefully it will have knocked some sense in.

freakboy1610

Colonoscopy. Need I say more?

speshul91

Got out of my car at a friends earlier, she lives on a REALLY steep hill, locked the car, turned round was sat on my arse in the middle of the road.

chillidoggy

Easy.

I sent a.......’personal’ text message to the wife earlier this morning. I only realised it hadn’t gone to the right person when I received one back from my boss saying yes, but only if he could go first.

boogieman

chillidoggy said:

Easy.

I sent a.......’personal’ text message to the wife earlier this morning. I only realised it hadn’t gone to the right person when I received one back from my boss saying yes, but only if he could go first.

Wasn’t a dick pic was it? 

blobb

Few years back I was in Tesco with a flatmate, I noticed a trolley full of reduced stuff and called him over. " Hey look here - loads of cheap crap they were going to chuck out, let's dig in" says I.

......shortly followed by "Excuse me, that's my trolley" from a red faced bargain hunter.

Last night in Tesco I heard the same phrase, looked around and had to remove all the sweets I just loaded into some woman's trolley.

Me and supermarket trolley's appear to not mix too well.

FarleyUK

This, from Saturday night.

https://youtu.be/b-ZzqV9Lv_Q

relic245

Waking up at 3am hearing a noise downstairs and convincing myself someone was breaking in.

Eventually dialling 999 at the same time as venturing cautiously downstairs. 

Just after I told the operator that someone was breaking in I found my wife had set the breadmaker on a timer and it was making a racket in the kitchen.