little things online sellers add to their listings that don't do anything for you.

adamm82

When they say they just restrung the guitar 'with a fresh set of [insert brand]' 

Would a fresh set of strings be a deal breaker?

That's the first thing I usually change. 

NeilMcG

Any mods or "upgrades". I want to do that!

Phil_aka_Pip

Same as house sellers. They want more money because they've "decorated" the place in their horrible disgusting colours. I wouldn't pay them any more than I'd pay for a scruffy do-upper, as I'd have to redecorate it anyway!

adamm82

Phil_aka_Pip said:

Same as house sellers. They want more money because they've "decorated" the place in their horrible disgusting colours. I wouldn't pay them any more than I'd pay for a scruffy do-upper, as I'd have to redecorate it anyway!

Hehe i’m Looking at places at the moment. People do seem to like to put up inspirational quote rubbish up on the walls. 

Legionreturns

I like it when people think you'll pay more for a guitar because it's from a smoke free and pet free home. 

If they've got a guitar I want, and it's been played by a Doberman smoking Woodbines I'd still buy it. 

JerkMoans

Insertion of the word ‘lawsuit’.

RiftAmps

"Never gigged"


Why? Does it sound that bad that you're ashamed?

adamm82

RiftAmps said:

"Never gigged"


Why? Does it sound that bad that you're ashamed?

I assumed it was I am not so good so I am not in band. Just like me really. 

adamm82

I also ignore peoples ‘opinion’
’in my opinion this [insert cheap guitar] Guitar is aLes Paul killer and better than all the vintage guitars and Gibson custom shop models and the real 1959 Les Paul I own’ 

Sassafras

As soon as they call a guitar 'she' I feel so sick I can't carry on reading all the way through whatever else they say.

BRISTOL86

Can’t believe we’ve got this far without ‘plays like butter’

thermionic

Anything that’s in the “seller refurbished” category. What does that even mean? While I’m at it, “New, other” can do one as well. I saw a ten-year old guitar yesterday in the “New, other” category!

SimonC

“Can only increase in value.”

thermionic

Sassafras said:

As soon as they call a guitar 'she' I feel so sick I can't carry on reading all the way through whatever else they say.

I would never buy a guitar from anyone who uses such a description. Just to teach them a lesson.

Anyway, you shouldn’t anthropomorphise guitars, they don’t like it when you do that.

adamm82

‘This guitar actually belonged to Joe Blow from the spanners’

StefB

“Happy bidding!”

Sassafras

Might have been played by - 'insert guitar hero name'.

skaguitar

a price I can't afford....

mbe

"I want it to go to a good home". (So anyone from a council flat needn't apply).

prowla

Sassafras said:

As soon as they call a guitar 'she' I feel so sick I can't carry on reading all the way through whatever else they say.

Yep - I really do stop reading right there!

prowla

"Fender Squire" - it's bloomin' Squier!

"Plays like butter" - sounds messy; I'd better bring along a cloth then.

"Lawsuit" - baloney.

"Road worn" - it's never been out of the seller's bedroom, along with the Dremel they used to hack bits off it.

"Rare" - nobody liked them enough to buy any.

"A cheeky Fender logo" - FRO!

"Waterslide" - FRO again!