Quips from the band/audience

wolsnah

Saw Megadeth in Rock City back in the late 90s I think it was. Dave Mustaine stood their proudly at the front of the stage in what could only be described as the sort of top a deep sea trawler worker would wear. Everyone was enjoying the gig, the music died down and in that perfect moment a voice cried out "Nice jumper!"

Cue a wry smile from Dave, a cock of the head and on with the show whilst the crowd were chuckling away.

boogieman

McSwaggerty said:

This goes back a bit. Glasgow Apollo 1970's 
The Heavy Kids,  a London based band were supporting Deep Purple.
They walked on Stage and were ready to play their first song but they had some issues with the guitarists amp. So, in an effort to keep 3,500 punters attention, Gary Holton, their singer, grabs the microphone and shouts out in an aggressive Cockney accent.. .... .
'Alright ya bunch of Scottish Cunts'!!!! ?? '
Big Mistake - never seen as much stuff thrown at a stage ever.... Bottles, boots, bits of seats..... The Band left the stage without playing a note !!    Brilliant. 

I saw the Heavy Metal Kids a few years back. They had John Altman (Nick Cotton out of Eastenders) on vocals, presumably because he looks like Gary Holton.  It certainly wasn’t for his singing skills, he was absolutely bloody terrible. 

Paul_C

The Nick Cave/Nirvana one reminds me of a Jam gig where the last support band were getting some stick from the impatient crowd.

The singer stepped up to the mic.and said "this is our last song" (huge cheer from the audience) "we're going to play it twice" (applause from me).

57Deluxe

rsvmark said:

.

Mine is Michael Hutchence @ Wembley who told the crown not to ‘ throw things as it’s fucking stuipid’ And received an Apple launched from halfway right is the niagras for his trouble.

...lucky he didn't get hung by them for Treason! ...Oh hangon, maybe he did??!

Reverend

randella said:

Someone mentioned Reading '92 above, I clearly remember the incident

I also remember Nick Cave on stage second to the headliner on Sunday which is who everyone was clearly waiting for...

Crowd: "give us Nirvana!"

Nick Cave: "yeah we don't know that one."

We left when Nirvana came on. 

english_bob

Went to see the notoriously shy Ray Lamontagne in Nottingham back when he was touring his first album.

He didn't say a word to the audience for maybe 45 minutes. 

Eventually, some enterprising fan shouts "RAAAAAY!!! How you doing?"

General chuckles around the room. Ray, who is also apparently prone to losing his shit with "disrespectful" fans, sees the funny side and actually says hello.

randella

english_bob said:

notoriously shy Ray Lamontagne

I saw the similarly-shy Richard Thompson a few years ago - you wonder why some people pick the careers they do!

He was fantastic, and had the audience in the palm of his hand - he still looked bloody terrified at points.

soma1975

Not a famous band at all but every time I think of it I laugh. A mate's band playing a party at a south London recording/rehearsal studio in the early 90s - it's their big debut and everyone they know is there.

'Good evening ladies and gentlemen, we are Gyroscape!'

When suddenly a voice from the back of the room shouts back 'Fire escape!'. 

Audience laughed. The band hung their heads and mumbled through their set with all the wind taken out of their sails

Split up soon after. 

Paul_C

I rarely heckle, but do recall one that got a laugh - I was playing an open mic. night in Waterloo and one of the other acts sang and played ukulele with a kazoo velcroed on top which he plucked off to play a solo with.

At the end of his set he said "If anyone's interested, I've got some CDs for sale in my car", and without thinking I said "who are they by?".

I'm pretty sure I stole the line from somewhere, but can't recall where.

EricTheWeary

I know it’s a TV show and not a gig but I love the end of this:
https://youtu.be/Y-FkdWr5Q5U

Dopesick

Can't remember off the top of my head but the best stage banter machine has to be Devin Townsend. He's an absolute riot.

Emp_Fab

Emp_Fab said:

I once went to a charity show compered by this twat....



He was combative with the audience from the start, and not in a funny way, but a "I'm better than you, you plebs" way.  Singularly unfunny, got heckled, threw his toys out of the pram and ended the show by singling out a woman who had light-heartedly heckled him a couple of times by saying nastily "and YOU..... (points), You're just a spiteful cunt" then walked off stage.

What a monumental bell end.

...and he's just been charged with common assault and false imprisonment. (Probably against a woman).  What a surprise.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-45532153

darthed1981

There were more than a few occasions on buzzcocks when lamarr crossed from banter to actual bitterness.

Funny character.

ICBM

The only time I've ever gone in for audience participation was when I saw Lloyd Cole in a small venue, and he introduced a song from the Bad Vibes album by saying that "I Tried To Rock" was about that album, which was rightly regarded as the worst thing he's ever done... I objected to hearing one of my favourite records put down that way by the man who wrote it, so I rudely interrupted him by shouting "oy, that's a great album!" - and to my slight surprise, most of the audience gave me a round of applause. Hopefully he has been suitably chastised and reassessed his opinion .

Philly_Q

darthed1981 said:

There were more than a few occasions on buzzcocks when lamarr crossed from banter to actual bitterness.

Funny character.

And on Shooting Stars.  He never seemed to like the "Fifties throwback Mark Lamarr" jokes.

Bridgehouse

Philly_Q said:

darthed1981 said:

There were more than a few occasions on buzzcocks when lamarr crossed from banter to actual bitterness.

Funny character.

And on Shooting Stars.  He never seemed to like the "Fifties throwback Mark Lamarr" jokes.

Probably because his opinions, prejudices and attitude should have stayed in the 50’s

yorkio

munckee said:

To be fair the Milton Keynes Bowl has nowhere to get shade, I was there for REM in 95 supported by Blur and people were getting sunstroke and all drinks stands ran out of soft drinks by early afternoon,"

There wasn't much need for shade on that occasion, as I recall - it absolutely lashed down for the entire day.

TheOtherDennis

darthed1981 said:

There were more than a few occasions on buzzcocks when lamarr crossed from banter to actual bitterness.

Funny character.

Can't remember who said it, but someone once described Lamarr's stint on Buzzcocks as "the longest career suicide note in history."

DesVegas

My mates first gig with his new band was around a month ago with his father in the crowd. He said "this ones dedicated to my dad, it's called "Please stop touching me there."

Genius.

Reverend

About 17 years ago we played with a sludge band called mistress. Their singer would hit himself and asked people to hit him  

Our bassist obliged. Said singer finished set before going for 7 stitches.