Completely Made Up Yet (Not) True (Non-)Facts About Gear

randomhandclaps

The reason David Gilmour had to use so many delay units when he played the Albert Hall this year is that over half of them were in fact set with the phase inverted to cancel out the delay feedback still hanging around from when he played there in 2006.

olafgarten

Drinking a Pumpkin Spice Caramel Macchiato allows a guitarist to permanently increase the tone of any guitar he/she touches for the next hour.

More Tonez FTW!

PolarityMan

The Klon centaur is jsut an input jack wired to an output jack. The knobs and switches don't actually do anything.

preston61

John Mayer ended his relationship with Katy Perry because he couldn't bend her G string with the same satisfaction as he could his

Teetonetal

Mike Mathews consciously make pedals with the structural resistance of tissue paper due to his bad experience of boutique builders cloning his muff circuit. When they try to remove his PCBs to reverse engineer they disintegrate into dust. 

Gassage

The most-missed selling point of the 2015 Gibson range with self tuners was they were suitable for those with nut allergies.

dogload

Moss said:

Joe Bonnamassa doesn't actually exist

I would like to endorse that statement. 

ThorpyFX

The Gibson True Historic Guitars are so pricey because they are actually real 1950's/60's guitars that Gibson have retrieved from the past using their time machine. This machine is an evolution of the robot tuners that allowed gibson to tune space time. The guitar cost represents an amortisation of the $5 Trillion they spent on the time machine. well at least thats what i heard from dave.....

mellowsun

The real reason that the Line 6 Helix is delayed is because some of their amp models went on a bender with Kate Moss and are currently in rehab.

Clarky

Winny_Pooh said:

Joe Bonamassa's glasses block him from seeing the harmful diatonic notes on his fretboard.

reacto bum note shades??

Clarky

it has been recognised by the EU trading standards commission that the Axe-FX sounds more real than the real amps it's modelling..

this means that real amps cannot be classed as being real..

the EU trading standards commission will soon pass a law stating that the term 'real' cannot be applied to them and therefore once in place, they can only be referred to as amps..

BintyTwanger77

Every engineer at TC Electronics is made entirely from organic hemp.

TC are currently developing a multi-FX like the G System but entirely powered by a small wind turbine.

Clarky

BintyTwanger77 said:

Every engineer at TC Electronics is made entirely from organic hemp.

TC are currently developing a multi-FX like the G System but entirely powered by a small wind turbine.

I heard that TC are also developing a means of having the mechanical energy generated by the vibrating strings harnessed to help reduce the overal power consumption of the G-System..

they've branded it the G-String

TimmyO

randomhandclaps said:

The reason David Gilmour had to use so many delay units when he played the Albert Hall this year is that over half of them were in fact set with the phase inverted to cancel out the delay feedback still hanging around from when he played there in 2006.

hahaha

BintyTwanger77

If you're worrying about whether you should sell 2 expensive Strymon pedals for a second/third H9, or vice versa, or a Neunaber, you're a daft eejit who should just enjoy what you have *points to self*

therose789

You need more reveb. 

thecolourbox

Jack White's famous octave up solo effect is actually slowed down from how fast he's actually playing it, so it is in effect an octave down

thecolourbox

Hendrix quite liked the reverb and mods on the Line 6 m13, but he said the drives were a bit meh

timmysoft

The ProCo Rat was originally called Gary

ddlooping

The stuff Marshmallows are made of is the best tonewood.