Nearly cracked.....

StanleyAccrington

....and bought a Barnes and Mullins 5 string banjo whilst in my local guitar shop. I know three chords and one very basic roll....but the peeps in the shop must have thought I was a proper redneck/chav as I tried it out Scruggs style. But no....I came to my senses....declined to purchase....and went for a pint instead. Banjos!! Horrible things.

ICBM

What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you throw a banjo into a skip and it doesn't touch the sides.

What's the difference between a banjo and a ukulele?

A banjo burns longer.

What's the difference between a banjo and an onion?

No-one cries when you cut up a banjo.

Always treat a banjo as a warning sign.

StanleyAccrington

There's no need for that. Some of us are just failed guitarists who go on to play ukuleles/banjos/mandolins pretty well.

ICBM

I know . Just being snarky…

I don't know what it is about banjos, but I just can't play them. I can actually play banjo-style lines better (or less badly...) on a guitar. I've even tried a 6-string banjo and that was as bad. It must be something to so with the dynamics I think - totally different from guitar.

I can't play mandolin either, although I don't have any problem with ukuleles. I have no idea really why.

If you're feeling upset about the above post, just substitute 'accordion' for banjo and 'concertina' for ukulele and then I'm sure we can both laugh about it .

StanleyAccrington

can't play mandolin either, although I don't have any problem with ukuleles. I have no idea really why.

If you're feeling upset about the above post, just substitute 'accordion' for banjo and 'concertina' for ukulele and then I'm sure we can both laugh about it .

Detente.....and respect fella.

StanleyAccrington

And you have helped me with my recent guitar related issue. You're a top bloke ICBM.

midlifecrisis

I left a banjo n an unlocked car hoping someone would steal it. When I got back there were three more banjos inside it