"I never wanted a campervan, my now ex girlfriend did. So we comprised and purchased a camper, without ever laying eyes on it first might I add. It was intended to be a "joint" project which in reality turned into her standing round for half a day complaining about the shed we'd brought, and the remainder of the time on my back about how long it was taking to transform it into her "perfect tranquil cabin on wheels". Yikes.
Fast forward a few months and she decided to up and leave (probably for a man with a much more impressive motorhome than mine) leaving only behind this sad slab of misery on wheels. Apart from being an eyesore and driving down local property prices, it serves as a personal reminder that the last few years of my life have truly and utterly been a waste.
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I'm not locked in here with you, you are locked in here with me.
There's things I've had, there's things I wanna have"
Needless to say....he sold a lot of property and made a fortune !
"If you've made it this far you are probably mentally unwell or still being forced into making a perfect love den for those romantic weekend getaways, either way I applaud the dedication. If you do decide to bid on it and God forbid you actually win, you will have to get it transported or collect it yourself as I have neither the time, the means or the will to deliver it for you. [...] I'm just trying to get a little money back so I can go on a heavy night of drinking, perhaps visit a lady of the night depending on how well the auction goes and then close this awful chapter of my life."