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nikki Sixx is 64 & still playing then look at the stones etc .
I think it also depends a bit on what you want to achieve from playing guitar.
If it's just for fun/hobby then getting stressed about it is kind of defeating the purpose.
And oddly (in reference to the pinky weakness) I did a lot of exercises early on to strengthen the pinky independence and now I almost use the bugger too much
Whether I'll ever end up in a band I have no idea , I'd like to get as far as being able to get some mates together for a bit of practice/jam kind of thing.
I too used to get frustrated when trying to learn riffs. Probably nothing to do with what is happening to you, but it turns out my problem was trying to learn with 'free guitar lessons' on YouTube. I got fixated with sounding like this and that, skipping the basics. I could hit all the notes in a difficult riff, but it would still sound like shit.
One day, I played one of these difficult riffs for its creator and he said 'oh wow, you must be hearing a different drummer'. As a matter of fact, I do hear a different drummer, in general (sensory processing disorder, part of my autistic curse/super power). But it doesn't mean I can't do better. After that, I spent a year doing things like clapping to a metronome and playing slow. Back to basics, or in my case, forget everything and start again. I am now developing my own vocabulary, my own technique and my own sound. Slowly, but I am not sure I can/want to do it any other way.
Jon
My trading feedback: https://www.thefretboard.co.uk/discussion/210335/yorkie
In this age of instant gratification, I think you have to just set aside all expectations of how long it will take, and just focus on the notes and techniques, and just work on it repetitively until you are reasonably satisfied.
As an example, I learnt the intro to Jimi Hendrix's Little Wing several years ago. If memory serves me right, I think it took me 4 to 6 weeks to learn, bar by bar. Take 1 (or 2) bar at a time per night, practice continuously for about an hour. So practice the bar until i get it right, then join it with the bar from the night(s) before. Basically it took me over a month to play something that lasts less than 30 seconds.
When I could finally string it all together, and play it at a pace good enough for me (which is nowhere at the same speed or character that Hendrix plays it with) then I moved on. But at least I felt a sense of satisfaction and achievement.
From time to time, I just test myself by trying to replay it on my own, to make sure I don't forget it, and also to then revisit and analyse what's going on. It's amazing when I hear the original compared to my version (nowhere near the same), but you then start to hear all the nuances and dynamics that Hendrix puts in, and opens up a whole new dimension of appreciation of his genius, and hopefully understand and improve on your own playing.
Licks are just phrases, often within solos. "Licks" is a stupid word and I don't think I've ever used it outside of this post.
But. I play Jazz.
My trading feedback: https://www.thefretboard.co.uk/discussion/210335/yorkie
I had a similar issue to the OP and went and (finally!) got some lessons. They helped embed the concept of pentatonic scales, arpeggios etc and now I find riff learning significantly easier as I can recognise shapes and patterns quicker.
Clearly my own lack of talent is the issue now - it turns out it's more frustrating knowing what you're supposed to play (but can't!) rather than not being able to learn it in the first place!