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Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
Weeding for the daughter for weeks as her husband is a complete numpty
We have removed our lawns
God: Hey St. Francis, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there in the Midwest? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect "no maintenance" garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.St. Francis: It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers "weeds" and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.God: Grass? But it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It's temperamental with temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?St. Francis: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. The begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.God: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.St. Francis: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it... sometimes twice a week.God: They cut it? Do they then bail it like hay?St. Francis: Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.God: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?St. Francis: No Sir. Just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.God: Now let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?St. Francis: Yes, Sir.God: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.St. Francis: You are not going to believe this Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.God: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost to enhance the soil. It's a natural circle of life.St. Francis: You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.God: No. What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and to keep the soil moist and loose?St. Francis: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. The haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.God: And where do they get this mulch?St. Francis: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.God: Enough. I don't want to think about this anymore. Sister Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?Sister Catherine: "Dumb and Dumber", Lord. It's a real stupid movie about.....God: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.
If you add the cost of Lawnmower,servicing,blade sharpening and petrol it's actually cheaper to get a gardner..........same with washing your own car..
I'm not locked in here with you, you are locked in here with me.
You can aid or increase therate of breakdown with stinging nettles added and urine also works for this purpose, more regular turning to get air to the living activity can make a lot of difference if you have the time and energy.
I have a small push mower that sits outside, under cover. I cut the grass probably twice a week and it takes about 10 mins.
It's the kind of job I do when I'm walking past it. Used to have a petrol mower but it was a pain. The garden is not massive so I can get away with a push mower, it's just shit if you let the grass grow long (i.e. when you go on holiday).
When you say the reel jams, do you mean with long grass? I actually don't like using a strimmer on large areas of long grass, it's not the best tool for the job.
re the edging, if it's only a small length, then you may be better off getting a good pair of shears.
I'm not locked in here with you, you are locked in here with me.
Then I bought a good petrol mower, self-propelled, electric start, and now I really like it.
As a petrol head, it's something with an engine that I can drive and tinker with.
Rift Amplification
Brackley, Northamptonshire
www.riftamps.co.uk
Yep, I'm a lawn mower geek!
Bloke round the corner from us put some down, the same night someone came with a van and nicked it!
Ithangyou.
I'm not locked in here with you, you are locked in here with me.