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I remember attempting to learn the top gun theme many years ago from a tab in a magazine, and the fingering was bloody hard! Years later I saw an excellent guy on Youtube showing ho to play it and he used something more akin to an arpeggiated chord, which was a million times easier. I think that some 'tabbers' are just a bit lazy.
Music is like a language in many ways and being able to read English without being able to speak nor comprehend would be regarded as less than optimal.
Again I see the utility in tabs but there is no reason to ignore ear training completely and only focus on tabs as if they are somehow direct substitutes. Sure, it's hassle-free, it's also relatively development-free and often quite surprisingly inaccurate.
I also don't see the "would simply not be able to indulge". There's nothing about ear training that makes it only for children and prodigies. It's a choice.
Over the years though I worked tirelessly on improving my ear and knowledge. I would listen to songs playing on the radio on the way to work and mentally work out the chord sequences .. then I would get home, pick up a guitar and see if I had it right. After a while it became more and more right to the point I had taught myself quite accurate relative pitch.
So relative pitch isn't as good as perfect pitch, I can't just hear a note and know what it is but I can recognize the intervals between 2 notes or chords quite quickly and accurately. Later I started teaching guitar so taught myself music theory so I could teach guitar properly and get kids though their GCSE music. The knowledge of theory then gives you the tools to work things out even faster. Because, for example, if a piece of music sounds diatonic (all within one key, no borrowed chords or strange changes) then you know what notes / chords are used and what aren't. So working out songs gets even quicker and easier. Plus you get to harmonize on the fly and jam with 100% confidence.
I think I was about 45 before I really learnt basic music theory so it's never too late
I don't have any real experience with piano, but I got to the point where I could tell which notes different sections/octaves were about to fall on. That's mostly from improv on guitar and gaining intuition for theory, insofar as note spacing and positions.
I started teaching myself music theory alongside guitar at age 17 and I've been transcribing songs for guitar and bass for almost as long so I now have a substantial library of transcriptions to refer to.
It's now almost 40 years later and I dabble at transcribing. I can't do it very well, but I can do it a LOT better than I used to. I do it for the pleasure, sort of like doing a crossword and it's much more satisfying. I encourage you to practice doing it and you will get better.
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For clarity; vocal range mightn't necessarily been the correct term, it's more like their songs are really comfortable for me to sing in a lower octave that compliments her vocals. (probably the same thing as "vocal range, -octaves")
And that album is (technically) Dungeon Synth, so it's relatively easy to transcribe on piano as is populated by relatively simple, repetitive melodies.
I don't understand the five years comment. In five years you could have trained your ear somewhat (or well!). You say you still have no real ear for music as if that's because of lack of talent, but it's more likely because you haven't trained your ear. It's great that you've done what you've done and long may it continue, but there's no reason to assume that "having an ear for music" will "just come to you", one has to put in the hours.
As for standard notation, the thread is about tabs vs ear, not standard notation. That was just when all the proper musicians came out to show off.
The thing is, we don't learn languages by speaking. We learn them by (at least) listening, processing, and speaking. Somewhat like ear training. Food for thought?
(Caveat: children learn languages like that; adults often need to learn grammar which you might compare to music theory. Adults who learn languages purely by listening and speaking tend to speak poorly compared to those who learn some grammar as well. This is because adults don't have the sponge-like learning capacity and ability of children.)
Playing is great, ear training for those who want it only enhances playing experience and with apps like Functional Ear Trainer and Perfect Ear, a few minutes a day and the improvement is very real. A good use of toilet time (apparently).
Bit of a light bulb moment for me was a Marty Friedman interview where he said he'll change the positioning and fingering of stuff that's on the record to make it more comfortable for himself playing it live.
As regards the OP's question - I'll generally try and figure out chords and riffs by ear... if it's taking too long then I'll go online for the tab. Solos - I'm lazy ... I'll look online.
For certain song's chord voicings I've looked at the (piano) sheet music online - an instance where being able to read standard music notation is useful (I've never put in the effort to sight read proficiently - I just don't have a need to).
Thing with the ear is it's a learning process and you do learn over time how to get better and quicker at picking it up...it trains the lugs