Design and name your own pedal/guitar/amp

Gassage

But....it must be innovative and have a USP.

Oh and a name...

Mine- the Ameliorator buffer

A first in chain buffer/boost/eq pedal that automatically detects the type of pick up (HB, SC, P90) in your guitar and adjusts the signal chain level accordingly.

Neat, eh?

Moss

Pretty much the same but it detects who is playing it and mutes me

Gru

God knows what made me think of this?

My pedal is called the 'Slug' (c)2015

Shaped like a ..........slug.

Its last in the chain.

Has 2 stalks (stomp buttons)

Its standard signature sound is squelchy

Button 1 is called 'trail' which adds a thin layer of shimmery gloss

Button 2 is called 'salt' which adds instant fizz.

Phil_aka_Pip

Der MusikReiniger

Takes midi i/p from the rest of the band, so it knows what tempo, time signature, and key you're playing in. Then it adjusts the tuning of anything you play, and aligns the leading edges of the notes on quaver, semiquaver or triplet boundaries as appropriate.

It cleans your act up so you can go on as pissed or as stoned as you like.

Shark_Eyes

The Royal amp

It's got a warming plate heated by the valves, to put your mug on , and a biscuit holder, that looks a bit like a tiny toast rack.

You can buy additional accessories, such as a cake stand and a kettle that can be activated by a footswitch.

Chalky

The Royal Deluxe includes built in slipper warmer and a clock that beeps to wake you up when its past your bedtime.

Cirrus

FloRa peTal - It's a beautiful flower shaped pedal that takes your shit playing but makes you come up smelling of roses.

PolarityMan

I'm going to bring out an entire range.

A volume pedal that works on drummers

A metronome that works on drummers

A killswitch that works on drummers

Sheet music that works on drummers

etc......

Wazmeister

The Selfie Amp..

It's a big bastard heavy tube amp... That carries itself into gigs...

mudslide73

An amp that does a spectral analysis of the room and mix you're playing in then adjusts the dials accordingly. This could also work on PAs.

Oh, it's a jokey thread... err what about a pedalboard that has wheels and brakes? You could skate into the venue and just plug in!

IanSavage

The 'All'bout' - a mechanical device which, when you introduce yourself to someone as a bass player, whips out from behind your head and smacks them in the face if they start singing that they're "all 'bout dat bass, no treble".

EricTheWeary

As always the VictoriaCorenacaster. Big, curvy guitar that sounds so sweet and makes me feel so inadequate. Oh baby, yeh... ">

Skipped

PEDALBORED.

A range of clothing for guitarists that just use a cable.

Alnico

I am going for a pedal called the 'School Run Mum'.
At any time it could appear on your board wherever it wants to or indeed on the other side of the room, when you step on the switch it emits a high pitched squeeling noise until you switch it off again and leave it alone, it requires a power supply that is unobtainable and if you try to leave it at home when you take your equipment out to "Go and have a good time" it gets so furiously jealous that even with no battery or power supply it will burst into flames and burn your house down leaving a charred message on the wall that reads "it should have been you, you BASTARD !".

Gassage

Hmmmm - I was semi-serious with the OP you bastards.

OK- I give you the Chameleon TGP, a pedal equipped with appearence and colour changing iridophore cells (like a chameleon).

Which, in moments of poverty, low self-esteem and boredom, allows you to pop onto TGP every week, start a NPD thread and get instant reflected glory, without actually having to buy anything new.

Bucket

Inspired by my dad's struggle with reverb pedals to use with his reverb-less, loop-less Mesa Transatlantic, I'd try to do a reverb or a delay with a mini-switch to change the sound to something far less overt, making it more suitable for amps with no FX loop. The delay would be called the Come Again?! and the reverb would be called the Chamber of Secrets.

Then I'd have an overdrive exactly like my Nobels ODR-1, but with a bit more poke available at the top end of the gain range to take it into low-gain fuzz/distortion territory (while completely retaining the super-sweet overdrive sounds at lower gain settings, of course). I'd give it a more rock and roll name than "ODR-1"... it'd be called the Supersonic Velvet.

Bucket

I'd also do a fuzz inspired by my Rainger FX Son of Freakenstein, but in a bigger enclosure with a volume control on the back. I'd keep the knife-switch and the oscillation feature (which would effectively remain the only tone control) but I'd add a gain control to take full advantage of the spluttery synth-like noises you can get from the inbuilt noise gate cutting in when the guitar volume's rolled down.

Then I'd have a bank of mini-switches up top, next to the knife switch - one for a sub octave, one for an upper octave and one to bypass the noise gate entirely. And then I'd have a second non-latching footswitch on the opposite corner to the on/off switch, which would give infinite sustain for as long as held down. Then I'd have an expression pedal input for controlling the oscillation frequency on the fly.

It'd be called the Destroyer of Worlds.

Flanging_Fred

The X-factorizer

A pedal shaped like Simon Cowell's face. It analyses your playing and if it detects any pointless noodling or repetitive cliché blues licks it plays a loud buzzer and shows a big LED X.

You then have to stamp on Simon Cowell's face to turn it off.

Flanging_Fred

^ can be upgraded via USB / Bluetooth to detect Stairway to Heaven, Sweetchild of mine, Enter sandman etc etc...

PolarityMan

ok a serious one then, an adaptive wah pedal that tracks what sound is coming in and tunes the filter start/end points so that you get the same range of sweep no matter where you play or with how much distortion.

bluechargeboy

My pedal analyses when the song has finished (has manual override for those fancy gaps) and plays clapping noises through the PA to get indifferent pub crowds started off.

It is called the CL-4P.