Adults afraid of their children?

Rocker

Possible a contentious post, not meant to be, but it seems that a lot of parents are afraid of their children.  This is shown by the way some parents allow their children to dominate the room/shop/space.  It would appear that children are being brought up to believe that they are the centre of the universe and that everyone else is there to admire and respond to their demands.  In *our* day children were "seen but not heard".  I am not suggesting that was the correct way but it is likely that the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction.

Anyone care to comment? 

capo4th

Children need guidance and are usually a product of their parents development. Manners and respect cost nothing and are one of the first things children should learn.

jd0272

I absolutely insist on our children listening and following appropriate and proportionate instruction. Backed up with due care, attention, and love. However, once they get to school, peer pressure prevails. Flamin' nightmare.

I hate my children misbehaving/creating in public. I don't like to see it from others, and don't expect others should have to tolerate our children's poor behaviour. I recall a conversation with a big fella outside the toilets in Debenhams in the Metrocentre when the middle 'un was two. Big fella's child had been rattling the door when we were in and he was toilet training, persistently. I wasn't aware it was a child however. Thus I remonstrated through the door.

When we came out, said big fella had a go, and demanded an apology. I pointed out to him that he was responsible for his child's behaviour, and asked him if he thought everyone else on the planet thought his Little Big Fella was as adorable and as well behaved as he and his fat minging Mrs did? As they don't, and he'd best wake up and get with the program. Pointing out that our two year old was behaving quite acceptably given the amount of maleness going on. 

Generally, ours are fine. Although I do wish Angus would eat with his gob shut, and not go in the sea at Tynemouth on a Sunday morning when I say "NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and don't have a change of clothes for him. Cause then Spencer and sophie follow suit. Pleased I fed 'em before their 'dip'. 

Witnessed at the school gates, scummy mummy screeching at her child (5yr old) "Get out of the fcuking car you stupid cnut, you're late..." Just delightful. Poor bloody child.

holnrew

Parenting around here is pretty upsetting, although I have become a little numb to it now.

I don't think the old fashioned "seen and not heard" approach is good either. There needs to be a balance between letting your kids be kids without them being massive twats.

Jewish kids do my head in, they play in the back alley and seem to try and make as much noise as possible. This evening they're banging something horribly loudly.

axisus

I was brought up right, and likewise, my children have been brought up to have good manners and be respectful. I think that you just have to look at bad kids parents and also their parents upbringing to see where it comes from. There was one kid as school with my son in the juniors he was a right little sh*t, F word all the time, talking disgusting stuff to the girls that they probably didnt understand. He got expelled. I saw his parents one time and it all made sense.

breakstuff

jd0272 said:

Witnessed at the school gates, scummy mummy screeching at her child (5yr old) "Get out of the fcuking car you stupid cnut, you're late..." Just delightful. Poor bloody child.

That's one of the most depressing things I've read recently.What chance does that poor kid stand of becoming a rounded,decent human being with a role model like that?

I really despair at the morons this country is able to churn out.

jd0272

breakstuff;365268" said:

jd0272 said:

Witnessed at the school gates, scummy mummy screeching at her child (5yr old) "Get out of the fcuking car you stupid cnut, you're late..." Just delightful. Poor bloody child.





That's one of the most depressing things I've read recently.What chance does that poor kid stand of becoming a rounded,decent human being with a role model like that?

I really despair at the morons this country is able to churn out.

Yeah I know mate. 'Twas awful. She had the obligatory cigarette perched in her mouth throughout, for additional guidance.

Mind, I was impressed she'd not got her pyjamas on, but less so that they live not two streets from said school gates.

jd0272

holnrew;365248" said:

Parenting around here is pretty upsetting, although I have become a little numb to it now.

I don't think the old fashioned "seen and not heard" approach is good either. There needs to be a balance between letting your kids be kids without them being massive twats.

Jewish kids do my head in, they play in the back alley and seem to try and make as much noise as possible. This evening they're banging something horribly loudly.

Eeh I thought they were as good as golden? Except for the erratic road crossing without warning (God tells 'em when to cross safely apparently) and the parents driving people carriers with absolutely no regard for the Highway Code?

Butter wouldn't melt eh!

Iamnobody

Speaking of scumbag parents...

A woman with a push chair was perched on our garden wall earlier.

My Mrs came out the house and enquired why she was there...

"Just doing a roll up bab them I'm off".

And off she went - with her freshly rolled cigarette and can of lager.

jd0272

Iamnobody said:

Speaking of scumbag parents...

A woman with a push chair was perched on our garden wall earlier.

My Mrs came out the house and enquired why she was there...

"Just doing a roll up bab them I'm off".

And off she went - with her freshly rolled cigarette and can of lager.

Well, look on the bright side, least she didn't glass yer Mrs.

capo4th

The quality of personnel in the UK is clearly in rapid decline.... God help us !

Axe_meister

I would normally agree with all the above, but as a parent of two kids with varying forms of Autism, it can be bloody hard to keep them in line, if they are having a meltdown it's nigh on impossible and very embaressing when in public

No we don't swear at the kids, call them names roll fags in front of them. I don't even have a glass of wine until they are in bed.

But please don't tar every child/parent with the same brush. 

Bellycaster

I agree with most of the comments on here, bad parenting does manifest itself through the offspring in many ways. Selfish Parents, Apathetic Parents, Aggressive Parents, Clueless Parents. I don't have kids and many would think that's a reason to tell me I shouldn't have an opinion. I don't agree with that, it doesn't mean I can't spot badly behaved kids or draw my own conclusions.

I also remember a little story called 1984, where the parents were scared stiff of their children, but that was for a completely different reason.

CHRISB50

Got home Thursday last week. Mrs told me when she went to pick up the littlun from school she saw a fight in the playground. I asked how old the kids were. She then explained it was actually 2 of the mums. I dread to think what their kids are like.

It's bad parenting that makes little shits. Peers sometimes don't help, but parents are the main reason.

Bucket

holnrew said:

This evening they're banging something horribly loudly.

Your mum didn't seem to mind.

johnnyurq

holnrew said:

.Jewish kids do my head in, they play in the back alley and seem to try and make as much noise as possible. This evening they're banging something horribly loudly.

Chortle, snort, fnaar fnaar.

Bottom jokes, puerile but funny. 

blueskunk

Yeah right, my old fella was scary.

holnrew

jd0272 said:

holnrew;365248" said:

Parenting around here is pretty upsetting, although I have become a little numb to it now.

I don't think the old fashioned "seen and not heard" approach is good either. There needs to be a balance between letting your kids be kids without them being massive twats.

Jewish kids do my head in, they play in the back alley and seem to try and make as much noise as possible. This evening they're banging something horribly loudly.

Eeh I thought they were as good as golden? Except for the erratic road crossing without warning (God tells 'em when to cross safely apparently) and the parents driving people carriers with absolutely no regard for the Highway Code?

Butter wouldn't melt eh!

They've thrown up Vs when I've looked out of the window before. It's worse in the summer when I have to have the windows open.

frankus

Rocker said:

Possible a contentious post, not meant to be, but

Do you EVER wonder why so many of your posts start that way?

 it seems that a lot of parents are afraid of their children. 

why does it seem that way to you? how long and how deep have you observed before dismissing two generations?

This is shown by the way some parents allow their children to dominate the room/shop/space.

Ah - I've got you - you're scared of kids being able to express themselves... you keep thinking when's their Dad going to beat them into silence for having the audacity to be a kid.

  It would appear that children are being brought up to believe that they are the centre of the universe and that everyone else is there to admire and respond to their demands.

feeling left out? you're not a kid any more.

kids need reasuring that they fit in, they are the centre of a parent's universe and they are our future and legacy - trample on them at your peril.

 In *our* day children were "seen but not heard".

and sexually abused a fair bit too, but it's okay they're only kids they should be obscene and not heard, eh?

 I am not suggesting that was the correct way but it is likely that the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction.

for you, good news is the pendulum will keep swinging the way it's going because declines in austerity, war and improved  healthcare means that parents can have fewer children and invest more time in them to ensure they're whole people when they become adults rather than bitter resentful self-righteous judgemental fuckers with no memory of what it was to be a kid.

and as with all evolution, the unevolved can stick around in their cave and die of old age alone.

Anyone care to comment? 

Okay, I;ll give it a go:

The adult afraid of children is you, adults unafraid of children are comfortable to accept they're boisterous and not schooled entirely in etiquette and that cramming too much of that shit in too soon makes for a stunted mind. Children have an honesty and innocence that if kept will make them a useful part of the human race... without it they become mixed up, angry about the wrong things, joyless traitors to humanity, traitors to themselves, a liability ... much like a zombie in an apocalyptic era - their discontent spreads like a disease, stifling clearer minds ... best avoided.

Emp_Fab

I can't stand the little shits. The Victorians had the right idea, thrash them daily and send them up the chimneys.

jd0272

Emp_Fab;365781" said:

I can't stand the little shits. The Victorians had the right idea, thrash them daily and send them up the chimneys.

Hmm, now there's a thing, I've three kids and two chimneys.......