Friday humour

Hootsmon

HAL9000

TheMarlin

axisus

proggy

On our wedding night, my Thai bride put her arms around me, kissed me on the cheek and said, "Don't get upset, a tiny penis is nothing to be ashamed of."

"I know," I replied, "But I just wish you didn't have one."

Hootsmon

Kebabkid

axisus

Emp_Fab

@Hootsmon ;;;  Your images are not showing - again.  This forum can't handle any image links that don't actually end with the filename of the image - e.g. ht tp://somesite/blahblah/pic.jpg will work, ht tp://somesite/blahblah/pic_jpg.1277Yb won't work.
ht tp://somesite/blahblah/pic.jpg?some_randomshit77654cbh also appears to work - I think it's because the filename is there with '.jpg' - it seems to ignore the question mark and stuff after it.

Kebabkid

'Sweet Dreams Are Made of This' (The Eurythmics 2020)
https://i.imgur.com/p6HrBYi.jpg

Haych

A man asked the shop assistant, "Where are all the potato clocks?"

The assistant replied, "Potato clocks, sir? I'm not sure what that is."

The man said, "The last time I was late for work, my boss said I'd get there by nine if I got a potato clock."

axisus

Haych said:

A man asked the shop assistant, "Where are all the potato clocks?"

The assistant replied, "Potato clocks, sir? I'm not sure what that is."

The man said, "The last time I was late for work, my boss said I'd get there by nine if I got a potato clock."

Haych

axisus said:

Haych said:

A man asked the shop assistant, "Where are all the potato clocks?"

The assistant replied, "Potato clocks, sir? I'm not sure what that is."

The man said, "The last time I was late for work, my boss said I'd get there by nine if I got a potato clock."

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL!!!  Oh my goodness, did not know this was a thing!

EricTheWeary

Haych said:

axisus said:

Haych said:

A man asked the shop assistant, "Where are all the potato clocks?"

The assistant replied, "Potato clocks, sir? I'm not sure what that is."

The man said, "The last time I was late for work, my boss said I'd get there by nine if I got a potato clock."

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL!!!  Oh my goodness, did not know this was a thing!

I thought everyone ran something off a potato in school. I’m not sure why but we did. 

Haych

I've heard of using apples as batteries before so I suppose the principle is the same.

RandallFlagg

Eurghhh....German sausage?

they're the wurst

guitars4you

Haych said:

A man asked the shop assistant, "Where are all the potato clocks?"

The assistant replied, "Potato clocks, sir? I'm not sure what that is."

The man said, "The last time I was late for work, my boss said I'd get there by nine if I got a potato clock."

had to read it 2/3 times before I got it - Clever !

axisus

the_jaffa

axisus said:

I think you need to find the other horcruxes

Kittyfrisk