Man-bag required.

Handsome_Chris

equalsql said:

Wow.. this thread is like a mix between Vogue and mumsnet. You bunch of ladyboys 

@EqualSql, more like angry mumsnet.

duotone

chillidoggy

Now look here: You lot are wandering off the path!

I want a smallish bag with a shoulder strap that saves me putting stuff in non-existent pockets, not a fucking great suitcase or a backpack. I'm thinking 200 x 200 x 75 (8" x 8" x 3") in old money, that kind of size.

Just so we're clear, I'm really not bothered whether I look like a twat, I've long since past caring, so as long as it's not fluffy pink or silver. And, whilst I know there's some here who call me a cunt, there's no need for it to carry tampons, or moisturiser.

Snap

I have had a Barbour waxed cotton messenger bag, been round the world with it, hard to beat IMO. Waterproof, tough, not too big, pockets, compartment for laptop, its a sort opf dark green, and above all it is nice and old school British.

tumi make good stuff, nothing really made better, but its expensive. Some of it is a bit poncy though.

Buy right buy once and all that.

Shorts with tons of pockets - I hate em. Shorts (again IMO) should be above knee, simple efforts, like an above the knee chino. No fuss, no nonsenses, timelessly cool. If you are young and with it, why not sport a little turn up on the shorts too?

The worst thing shorts wise are those totally square below the knee cargo shorts. Gimp kecks. If you want to wear Capri pants, wear em.

Handsome_Chris

Personally, @chilldoggy, I think that you're delightful.

Actually, you should moisturise, and if you're going to The Keys you may want some with UV protection. Also with Florida's crime rate some may suggest that a tampon can be used to treat gunshot wounds - this is a myth. In other words, good choice on binning off the tampons.

Doesn't your good lady have something suitable? Have you asked her for advice? At the risk of sounding sexist, would she not have a bit more experience in the field of accessories?

FX_Munkee

IMO nothing says "middle aged man that's past caring" like a Rocha Jon Rocha canvas messenger bag.

Mine's used daily for the last 4 years...

chillidoggy

Handsome_Chris said:

Personally, @chilldoggy, I think that you're delightful.

Actually, you should moisturise, and if you're going to The Keys you may want some with UV protection. Also with Florida's crime rate some may suggest that a tampon can be used to treat gunshot wounds - this is a myth. In other words, good choice on binning off the tampons.

Doesn't your good lady have something suitable? Have you asked her for advice? At the risk of sounding sexist, would she not have a bit more experience in the field of accessories?

Cunt.

chillidoggy

FX_Munkee said:

IMO nothing says "middle aged man that's past caring" like a Rocha Jon Rocha canvas messenger bag.

Mine's used daily for the last 4 years...

Like this one? Looks like it fits the bill to me.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Rjr-John-Rocha-Mens-Khaki-Washed-Canvas-Utility-Bag-From-Debenhams-/282016582210?hash=item41a97f8a42:g:p8IAAOSw~oFXHdVK

Sporky

Get a Doog bag. Then all the twits who would otherwise think you're gay or effeminate (how awful!) will be too scared that you'll throw a dog poop bag at them.

Or they'll just assume you've lost your dog.

FX_Munkee

chillidoggy said:

FX_Munkee said:

IMO nothing says "middle aged man that's past caring" like a Rocha Jon Rocha canvas messenger bag.

Mine's used daily for the last 4 years...

Like this one? Looks like it fits the bill to me.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Rjr-John-Rocha-Mens-Khaki-Washed-Canvas-Utility-Bag-From-Debenhams-/282016582210?hash=item41a97f8a42:g:p8IAAOSw~oFXHdVK

Pretty similar, mine's probably a tiny bit bigger. Like this one:-
http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10701_10001_083010642895_-1

Main "middle aged man who doesn't care anymore" points:-
it's £35
it's got no branding
you can fit stuff in it
it hasn't fallen apart yet

chillidoggy

Sporky said:

Get a Doog bag. Then all the twits who would otherwise think you're gay or effeminate (how awful!) will be too scared that you'll throw a dog poop bag at them.

Or they'll just assume you've lost your dog.

Are you real? The missus will never walk down the same street as me if I'm carrying a dogshit bag!

On second thoughts...........

Handsome_Chris

chillidoggy said:

Handsome_Chris said:

Personally, @chilldoggy, I think that you're delightful.

Actually, you should moisturise, and if you're going to The Keys you may want some with UV protection. Also with Florida's crime rate some may suggest that a tampon can be used to treat gunshot wounds - this is a myth. In other words, good choice on binning off the tampons.

Doesn't your good lady have something suitable? Have you asked her for advice? At the risk of sounding sexist, would she not have a bit more experience in the field of accessories?

Cunt.

Now that's a bit uncalled for.

Sporky

chillidoggy said:

Are you real? The missus will never walk down the same street as me if I'm carrying a dogshit bag!

You're not meant to put the poop bags back in... 

chillidoggy

Handsome_Chris said:

chillidoggy said:

Handsome_Chris said:

Personally, @chilldoggy, I think that you're delightful.

Actually, you should moisturise, and if you're going to The Keys you may want some with UV protection. Also with Florida's crime rate some may suggest that a tampon can be used to treat gunshot wounds - this is a myth. In other words, good choice on binning off the tampons.

Doesn't your good lady have something suitable? Have you asked her for advice? At the risk of sounding sexist, would she not have a bit more experience in the field of accessories?

Cunt.

Now that's a bit uncalled for.

chillidoggy

FX_Munkee said:

chillidoggy said:

FX_Munkee said:

IMO nothing says "middle aged man that's past caring" like a Rocha Jon Rocha canvas messenger bag.

Mine's used daily for the last 4 years...

Like this one? Looks like it fits the bill to me.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Rjr-John-Rocha-Mens-Khaki-Washed-Canvas-Utility-Bag-From-Debenhams-/282016582210?hash=item41a97f8a42:g:p8IAAOSw~oFXHdVK

Pretty similar, mine's probably a tiny bit bigger. Like this one:-
http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10701_10001_083010642895_-1

Main "middle aged man who doesn't care anymore" points:-
it's £35
it's got no branding
you can fit stuff in it
it hasn't fallen apart yet

That one's a bit too big for what I want, but it's on the right track. It's cheap enough, durable, and doesn't scream at you. I'll swing by Debenhams on the way home to see if they've got one of the smaller ones in stock.

dchwhite

Tacky Macky's generally have quite a few in stock, reasonably priced.

octatonic

Mike D has designed a $550 man bag.

http://pitchfork.com/news/66227-beastie-boys-mike-d-designs-550-grown-man-bags/?mbid=social_twitter

chillidoggy

A couple more contenders -

http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10701_10001_083010640060_-1

http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10701_10001_083010425495_-1

And there's shedloads more on the site. Looks like there's going to be some company time wasting this afternoon.

Iamnobody

£10.20 here if you insist on this nonsense!

https://m.zalando.co.uk/pier-one-across-body-bag-olive-brown-pi952ha13-n11.html

There's even a photo of it in action to show you how much of a cunt you will look.

Handsome_Chris

octatonic said:

Mike D has designed a $550 man bag.

http://pitchfork.com/news/66227-beastie-boys-mike-d-designs-550-grown-man-bags/?mbid=social_twitter

But can you buy one in the UK?