Proven ways to deter cats

HAL9000

Part of the problem is that the ancient Egyptians worshipped cats as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

Sporky

HAL9000 said:

Part of the problem is that the ancient Egyptians worshipped cats as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

Neither have people with animals' heads.

mellowsun

This one is expensive but it does work, although it takes a few weeks for the cats to get the hint

http://shopping.rspb.org.uk/catwatch-cat-deterrent.html

We have one in our back garden and we get far less cat shit than we used to.

RandallFlagg

tampadragon said:

RandallFlagg said:

Build a sandbag machine gun nest near your front door with 2 MG42s pointed at 45 degrees and a box of potato masher grenades.

Now, I love the sound of that, but I'm not sure the cats will understand what they are, and firing them would go against the no cruelty clause!

I have considered a machine gun nest with a hose pipe and some kind of PIR triggered valve, to just soak them when they enter my lawn, but I'm lazy and it sounds like a lot of work!

Imagine your neighbours if you did build a proper WWII German machine gun nest with uniforms and full crew, add an 88mm gun with netting, the whole works. They would think you are preparing for Brexit and get worried

Fretwired

mellowsun said:

This one is expensive but it does work, although it takes a few weeks for the cats to get the hint

http://shopping.rspb.org.uk/catwatch-cat-deterrent.html

We have one in our back garden and we get far less cat shit than we used to.

@mellowsun .. interesting. I posted that on page one but another forumite said he had two and they didn't work. So it works for you?

We have four or five cats that give us grief.

mellowsun

@Fretwired it seems to work for us, although we had to move it a few times to find the best location.

We have also mulched all our borders with coarse bark chippings which may be a factor.

joeyowen

A sawn off shotgun

I know you don't want to hurt them, but shout dance rummy and fire near their feet.

Either the cat's will fuck off, or the owners will sell up.

I hate cats (actually, owners...).  How can an animal go around shitting in everyone's garden, but the owners not care?

jonnyburgo

joeyowen said:

A sawn off shotgun

I know you don't want to hurt them, but shout dance rummy and fire near their feet.

Either the cat's will fuck off, or the owners will sell up.

I hate cats (actually, owners...).  How can an animal go around shitting in everyone's garden, but the owners not care?

Err, its not that they don't care its just that there is fuck all they can do about it.

littlegreenman

jonnyburgo said:

joeyowen said:

A sawn off shotgun

I know you don't want to hurt them, but shout dance rummy and fire near their feet.

Either the cat's will fuck off, or the owners will sell up.

I hate cats (actually, owners...).  How can an animal go around shitting in everyone's garden, but the owners not care?

Err, its not that they don't care its just that there is fuck all they can do about it.

 ^^ Cats just do their own thing, it's part of their charm. You either get that, or not. No problem either way.

Myself, I'm not exactly enamoured with dog owners who allow their dogs to shit in the street and not clean it up after them. There are a huge number of these round by me, and most other places I've lived and I'd say it's a far worse problem than a bit of catshit around the rose bushes.

digitalscream

I've found this does the trick nicely:

Seriously, we had a big problem with neighbourhood cats always being in the garden when I let the dogs out; haven't seen a single cat near our house since a couple of weeks after we got Coco.

nick79

Greyhounds are a great deterrent. Ours (sadly no longer with us) nearly caught a few before they got the message. 

jonnyburgo

We've got a dog and 3 cats, they make a fool of the dog on a regular basis. No other cats visit the garden since getting the dog though.

Clarky

water cannon

I shot a few cats with the hose one year set to it's most powerful jet setting..

it really pisses them off and it's lots of fun

Hertz32

Teetonetal

Clarky said:

water cannon

I shot a few cats with the hose one year set to it's most powerful jet setting..

it really pisses them off and it's lots of fun

This 100%. It's fun, cathartic and doesn't hurt the cats, but seems to keep them away.

Also, if I see a cat shit in my garden and know who owns it, I tend to scoop it with a trowel and lob it back over the fence to the owners garden or leave it on their doorstep with a message that I am returning their property. (the shit not the cat). Serves no real purpose, but is also cathartic. 

I don't think I'm liked by the cat owners in our neighborhood.

tampadragon

All great suggestions, the issue with spraying them etc, is that as it's the front lawn and a corner house, most of the street can see us out the front, which is why I can no longer garden in my pants!

I wouldn't want to be seen to be being cruel to the cats as that will upset them and they do take a lot of parcels in for us as we are never at home in the day time!

I may try putting Bark down, they are freshly dug borders as I took up the lawn edge to create them, we are also going to try letting our Dog out the front on a lead, problem is people over the road have a couple of quite aggressive Rottys which are never on leads, another pet hate of mine, if you can't control them they should always be on leads, and so we don't like our dog being in the street!

viz

While the neighbours are out, swap their cat for a horse. Horse manure is good for the garden.

stratosonic

Pepper dust has worked in the past, but I found zapping the furry critters with a large super soaker puts them off coming back again. Do cats have memories?

Jalapeno

stratosonic said:

Pepper dust has worked in the past, but I found zapping the furry critters with a large super soaker puts them off coming back again. Do cats have memories?

Yes, and getting soaked is high up their never-again list.  I found Tiger/Lion poo pretty effective, but you need to top up regularly.

I have the opposite problem dogs crapping and pissing on my lawn - both hounds are terrified of the cat but still unload in our garden if they think they can get away without a mauling from our mog.

Bygone_Tones

Neil said:

I hate the way cats crap all over people's gardens, kill songbirds and people still think they are cute.

But its OK to think dogs are cute? Because all they do is crap all over every bit of greenery there might be in any town or city, kill human babies and much larger wildlife than songbirds, and rip sheep to pieces leaving them to die in agony.