Proven ways to deter cats

ESBlonde

Bark mulch and then add holly leaves to the mix, also a few blackberry twigs strewn about. the thorns are a real put off to the cats.

My front garden is well cultivated and planted so has become the streets cat toilet, you can't plant with your hands even with gloves because of the fresh sh1t everwhere. Human pee applied from time to time works but goe easy or your garden will smell like a festival bog! Most deterents seem to become less effective over time. Holly leaves and blackcurrent stalks seem to be the most long lasting but you then have to deal with the thorns yourself at times.

strumjoughlamps

I am currently landscaping our front drive which is a time consuming task of getting up the old gravel down to mud on about 65% of the driveway(wife want drive for one car and grass/plants the rest). so it is being done at a slow pace, one hour here one hour there when I have time..

with disturbing the gravel the cats see it as a giant litter tray, I have found shake over the ground repellent to work not too bad but of course as soon as it rains it needs replacing.

Sporky

Bygone_Tones said:

But its OK to think dogs are cute? Because all they do is crap all over every bit of greenery there might be in any town or city, kill human babies and much larger wildlife than songbirds, and rip sheep to pieces leaving them to die in agony. 

Ah, you've met Sprocket then. This week she's destroyed an alligator, a giant caterpillar and a cow. This is her dealing the death-blow to the cow.

https://c2.staticflickr.com/2/1689/25748807945_e78191c27e_b.jpg

seany65

tampadragon said:

So to start with, I'm pissed that it's ok for peoples cats to roam the estate and dig up my plants and shit in my front garden!

It frustrates me so much!

I want to keep the cats away without harming them, as I don't condone violence towards animals, even if they are pointless little shits!

So any suggestions on proven methods to keep away the cats?

Place several medium to large cardboard boxes and bouncy balls around your garden.

The cats'll be too busy playing with the balls or sleeping in the boxes to dig up your plants or crap in yuor garden.

musteatbrain

I had this problem last month. Local cats decided to use my gravel filled driveway and dumped all over it for 3 weeks. Went to B and Q, bag of verve cat repellent and 6 lavender plants. No cat poo since.

Clarky

Teetonetal said:

Clarky said:

water cannon

I shot a few cats with the hose one year set to it's most powerful jet setting..

it really pisses them off and it's lots of fun

This 100%. It's fun, cathartic and doesn't hurt the cats, but seems to keep them away.

Also, if I see a cat shit in my garden and know who owns it, I tend to scoop it with a trowel and lob it back over the fence to the owners garden or leave it on their doorstep with a message that I am returning their property. (the shit not the cat). Serves no real purpose, but is also cathartic. 

I don't think I'm liked by the cat owners in our neighborhood.

and when they're totally soaked, they look like sad, scrawny little things..

which is really funny

and yes.. they never came back..

it seems that I have a couple of new cats to attend to this summer…

woohooo ! !

RandallFlagg

Howabout a series of B52 raids, like operation Arc light?

speshul91

Bygone_Tones;1140461" said:

Neil said:

I hate the way cats crap all over people's gardens, kill songbirds and people still think they are cute.



But its OK to think dogs are cute? Because all they do is crap all over every bit of greenery there might be in any town or city, kill human babies and much larger wildlife than songbirds, and rip sheep to pieces leaving them to die in agony.

 

That's not all dogs though. We have got 3 that look and sound hard but are softer than melted butter and shit scares of my cat.

PolarityMan

I was thinking that you're actually right my suggestion of dragons isn't that humane. You could get a sphinx though that way if the cats could answer a riddle they stand a chance of not getting eaten. Does anyone know if cats are good at riddles?

Sporky

PolarityMan said:

I was thinking that you're actually right my suggestion of dragons isn't that humane. You could get a sphinx though that way if the cats could answer a riddle they stand a chance of not getting eaten. Does anyone know if cats are good at riddles?

I think someone here should test them.

Sit three of them in a line, wearing black and white hats, and wait until one of them can tell you what colour hat it is wearing.

UnclePsychosis

Not sure how humane it is but when I was a child my mates mum kept a super soaker handy for chasing cats off. A few scares tended to teach them quickly!

Sporky

I don't think it's enormously inhumane.

Assuming it's loaded with water.

tampadragon

Sporky said:

I don't think it's enormously inhumane.

Assuming it's loaded with water.

And here was me thinking of loading it with Napalm!

Sporky

Schoolboy error - napalm'll eat through the plastic tank. You want isopropanol with a Bic lighter taped to the end of the barrel.

[insert obvious disclaimer]

tampadragon

Sporky said:

Schoolboy error - napalm'll eat through the plastic tank. You want isopropanol with a Bic lighter taped to the end of the barrel.

[insert obvious disclaimer]

Silly me, need to think these things through better next time! Also not sure my wife would be happy if I torched her plants either!

Cirrus

joeyowen;1139499" said:

I hate cats (actually, owners...). 

I hate people who make generalisations. All of them, they're absolute dickheads.

paulmapp8306

Shot guns.

littlegreenman

C'mon folks, they're cats, it's what they do. Super soakers are about the best idea, cats aren't daft and soon learn to avoid the asshole with the water pistol.

Some of the more extreme ideas here, including "shotguns" (what the actual fuck!? And don't try and use "I was only joking" as an excuse) are quite telling of people's levels of empathy.

Little Missy is quite likely the "enemy at your door", 13 years old, and still no bigger that a 12 month old kitten. WOOOO!!!!!

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13240506_10207435045166540_1889862938457542495_n.jpg?oh=f62f90e98f81e1d56aac160cd0448c01&oe=57F89F4A

PolarityMan

Sporky said:

PolarityMan said:

I was thinking that you're actually right my suggestion of dragons isn't that humane. You could get a sphinx though that way if the cats could answer a riddle they stand a chance of not getting eaten. Does anyone know if cats are good at riddles?

I think someone here should test them.

Sit three of them in a line, wearing black and white hats, and wait until one of them can tell you what colour hat it is wearing.

I dont know, all the forced rhyming that happens when you start putting cats in hats does my head in after a while.

Maybe instead of a sphinx you could use a basilisk so at least you get some nice ornaments for the garden.

WezV

If it makes you all feel better, mine come in the house to shit on the floor.

They were house cats for a long time and I don't think its occurred to them to go outside and do it.

Occasionally they use the litter tray, but they seem to prefer 2 foot either side.

2 cats, separate litter trays, cleaned twice a day minimum... They still don't get it