Flying: Things that irk me.

Danny1969

I'm a nervous flyer because I'm well aware of how many moving and electrical parts there are that can go wrong before you even factor in human error.  I generally get pissed at the bar before getting on a plane to take the edge off. 

I'm more into cruising these days. Get on a train to Southampton, walk to the berth and get on the boat and go to the bar. Yes it's slow but that's fine as it cruises all through the night too. Plus you get to see stuff, not just clouds. Then when you get back you literally just walk off the boat with your suitcase. Nicer experience than an airport. 

Heartfeltdawn

Offset said:

• I hate each and every single airport I've ever flown from.  But Atlanta is definitely the worst with JFK a close second.

JFK really is like travelling back in time. It feels like there should be a shop there selling Walkmans and Global Hypercolor T-shirts. 

$12 for a tuna salad sandwich is true GTFO material too. When Boots can deliver a £5 halloumi wrap with Pepsi Max and crisps, JFK can GTFO out even further. 

Moe_Zambeek

I was flying back from SFO recently and shitish airways called me up to the desk just as boarding started. I thought I was about to be bumped off the flight but to my delight I was upgraded to business. Result! Get given a new boarding pass and directed 3m to the lady now letting business passengers on, hand over the new boarding pass - big fat x. Back to the guy who upgraded me who apologised and told me in the 3 minutes it took between upgrade and pass check I had been downgraded again.

ICBM

I hate reclining seats.

Since it’s impossible to ever persuade the person in front of you to not be selfish dick and not push their seat back into your face, you then have no real option other than to do the same, and then everyone is crammed into a ridiculous tilted space that’s harder to get in and out of.

I would favour any airline which removes the option, and fits non-reclining seats in economy. If you still want to, pay more for business class where there’s more room in the first place.

HerrMetal

I hate flying with a passion. Had to do a fair amount over the years for work. Last time I took a personal flight with the family was flying to stay with friends in Cyprus around Easter 2005. We flew Helios on a Boeing 737 from Heathrow. A couple of months later Helios flight 522 crashed killing all on board. Fair chance it was the same aeroplane.

AK99

Gassage said:

I am a nervous flyer. 

I am encyclopaedic on flying, how to fly a plane, what can go wrong. I have gone on A300, A320 and &3 Flight sims to overcome and to learn. I am virtually an authority on crashes and their causes.

I have flown on everything going, hundreds of times.

But nothing works- in fact the more I learn the worse it is.

However, airlines blather on about safety, yet they don't make things easy for nervous PAX.

Things crew do that I hate:

1. DO NOT TALK BOLLOCKS when on climb out. I don't wanna know until we reach cruise. If you as attendants are talking, you are not focused on safety since the climb out is a key risk moment.
2, DO NOT TALK BOLLOCKS TRYING TO UPSELL- this again is infuriating. You're there to look after my safety (your words) not upsell mascara.
3. DO NOT TRY AND MAKE SAFETY BRIEFINGS FUNNY OR QUIRKY. They are key briefings which should be concise and professional.
4. DO not overcrowd back galley loo on narrowbody scheduled flight because there's 2 PAX in Club Europe. Use common sense- Safety>Privilege and if you get 10 pax queuing, a) it's dangerous in any case b) you're actually affecting the COG of plane on something like an Embreaer.
5. DO NOT TALK BOLLOCKS until the taxiing has finished- this is a key risk moment. See 11.
6. DO NOT TAXI like a twat because you're on a 30 min turnaround. 10knts is max for a turn and attempting a handbrake turn with a 73 isn't cool.

There's just a few. I'm sure I can think of more.

I have to ask, man.. do you drive ?

Timcito

ICBM said:

I hate reclining seats.

Since it’s impossible to ever persuade the person in front of you to not be selfish dick and not push their seat back into your face, you then have no real option other than to do the same, and then everyone is crammed into a ridiculous tilted space that’s harder to get in and out of.

I would favour any airline which removes the option, and fits non-reclining seats in economy. If you still want to, pay more for business class where there’s more room in the first place.

My guess is that the reclining seat is one of the last sad vestiges of good living that fllght passengers used to enjoy back when most people slogged it out on buses, trains and boats. You were da man as you tilted your seat back, an air-hostess hottie at your side serving you free booze with an umbrella in it!

But that was back when planes afforded ample space and flights were rarely full. With all that and more gone from flying, one last, proud remnant of the good old days is still just a button-push away for the bruised and despairing traveler - just one press, and back you go into that golden age. The rest of it can just go to hell!    

boogieman

Roland said:

boogieman said:

Addis Ababa is the worst airport I’ve ever been through. The ceiling was leaking when we were there, there was a big rainstorm at the time and there were buckets everywhere, vainly trying to catch all the torrents of water pissing through the roof. 

The toilets absolutely stank. 

All the food venues were shut. 

You obviously haven’t been through Kathmandu. 

I have actually but I don’t remember it being that bad? It was a long time ago though. 

scrumhalf

I don't like flying but I've found ways to cope.

Airports, on the other hand...

Everything is overpriced, seriously do. Which I find interesting as when I had to help a client prepare a tender for a unit for T5 at Heathrow the conditions stipulated that prices had to be the same as those offered in high street shops. You can get round that easily, make the coffee a few ml smaller, for example.

I also get pissed off at bookshops, where they seem to have only large format books when economy passengers have severe baggage limitations.

Paul_C

Never flown, doubt I ever will.

I'm not sure I would enjoy it, but I'll never know

VimFuego

as someone who routinely deals with members of the public and is contractually obliged to be nice to them (at all times!!!), here's a list of things that annoys me:
everything they say
everything they do
everything about how they look at you
everything
everything
everything

Nothing makes you hate people more than having to put up with them in order to pay your bills.

Philly_Q

VimFuego said:

Nothing makes you hate people more than having to put up with them in order to pay your bills.

Well that explains guitar shops.

blobb

The utter disdain airports have for blind people. Then again, it's better than the railways. As is usual, Europe is much better than UK.

Dominic

Roland said:

As an erstwhile frequent flier I hate airport food, much of which contain additives which make me ill. Redeeming factor is that sometimes there’s a non-chain food outlet. They’ve probably gone now, but Charles de Gaulle had an excellent pizzeria in the basement of the doughnut, and Milan Malpensa had somewhere serving freshly cooked food right at the top of the building land-side.

I also hate being forced to wend my way through that expensive shopping experience known as Duty Free.

Apart from that I like flying.

Yes .......DUTY FREE
what a fucking Liberty that is.......I do not want to be zig zagged through a load of Ghastly Chav Merchandise like a pig being led to the chop ion an Abattoir
What kind of creature really wants to buy a bottle of Pong at 4 am in the morning to save £9
BUT ....it's being forced to inhale the intoicated air of a French Tart's Boudoir that I hate ......I cannot stand the heavy ,vile perfumed air ....it gives me a headache /migraine instantly.....and the appalling bad manners of the people who bathe in the stuff and then walk into restaurants and bars spoiling the flavour of food and drink for everybody.
 Should be banned in restaurants,cocktail bars,pubs,offices .

Dominic

Philly_Q said:

I haven't been on a flight since 2017 and the last time I went outside the UK was 2001.  It doesn't sound like I'm missing much.

I think you are YOLO

Blueingreen

ICBM said:

I hate reclining seats.

Since it’s impossible to ever persuade the person in front of you to not be selfish dick and not push their seat back into your face, you then have no real option other than to do the same, and then everyone is crammed into a ridiculous tilted space that’s harder to get in and out of.

I would favour any airline which removes the option, and fits non-reclining seats in economy. If you still want to, pay more for business class where there’s more room in the first place.

Yep. The very fact that the seats are designed to recline undermines your ability to point out the bleeding obvious, that tilting back is a bloody selfish thing to do.  The tilter can legitimately say, I wouldn't be able to do this unless the airline thought it was ok for me to do it. So you're the unreasonable one for objecting to me doing something I'm supposed to be able to do.

Haych

I hate the sheer amount of time everything takes when flying.  Everything seems to take about eight times longer than it should.

I also hate being milked for cash because I'm about to get on an aircraft.  Everything seems to be an extra now, whether it's luggage, seating, boarding or whatever - everything is optional at an extra cost.

Then there's the stupid security - you can't take anything with more fluid than you can spit but you can purchase vats of liquids that have just been confiscated in the airport shop after security.

Other people!  Just bugger off and get out of my way!

And @Offset, you're correct, Atlanta is the most awful and hateful airport I've ever had the misfortune to pass through. Everyone involved in the design, build and running of that place must take special delight in the misery of everyone who has the misfortune to depart, arrive or connect there!

HAL9000

In the event of a depressurisation airbags will drop…blah, blah, blah…and breathe normally.

Sorry but if I’m strapped inside a rapidly depressurising metal tube travelling at close to the speed of sound the last thing I’ll be doing is breathing normally.

Iamnobody

Timcito

One thing that is oddly in favour of aeroplanes, even now, is how we never get knocked out by travel farts! Many people's digestive systems are inevitably in turmoil after a long day dragging round bags, drinking too much coffee, and eating airport food, but in all my years of flying I've not once caught a noisome whiff from anyone on board. Is it the air-circulation system that does it? Who knows? But when you think of the enormous potential for disaster, it truly is a wonder how the air stays so fresh!